**** it, I know its only 12 o clock. But it's not real beer anyway. It's like piss. But I deserve a few, and chill
Just been asked if I want to go over her friends this arvo for a Christmas drink. The answer is a resounding no! **** sake, why can't they just chill? Why do they have to be on the ****ing go all the time, so they can moan about it later? Knowing that pair the emphasises will be on the A in a drink too.
I always thought "a drink" meant booze, and big measures too. To my former outlaws, though, more often than not it meant tea (cup of, not a dinner oop north). And I always though "a swift half" was a euphemism for at least a gallon. But no, imagine my shock upon discovering that some people actually drink half pints of beer. The ****s. All very confusing.
A mate of mine moved to LA a few years ago. Went into his new office and met some new work people who suggested going for a drink after work to chat/get to know each other etc. He assumed that meant drinking 10 pints, a load of shots and ending up ****faced in some club at 4am trying it on with the hot bird from work. Turned out they went to a juice bar and all went home after some green smoothie.
Popped in hoping we might be discussing Jesus...looks like the Pagans have taken over Christ mass...I always said the Jehovah's Witnesses have got it right.
Jesus, being a Jew, more than likely supported Spurs. Explains why he was born in a barn - the brand new manger with cheese room was still unfinished. On the other hand it must have been a **** Christmas that year, because what are the chances of finding three wise men and a virgin in Tottenham? Santa, given his choice of colours, probably a gooner.
Been supporting Saints for over 40 years mate. I wouldn't have been doing that if I was easily demoralised
Just cracked a beer. Finished the prep for tomorrow done some wrapping and bought some last minute gifts.
Currently debating with to pop out for yet more Christmas drinks with friends. I popped out yesterday at 5. Got in at 11. Not sure I can handle popping out again. Just been and bought myself a new cafetière being as the nob head step daughter broke my old one when emptying the dishwasher.. I mean ffs she pays a whole £150 a month to live here clearly that should mean she has to do nothing whilst eating all the nice bits I bought for Christmas. The cow opened my prawn selection.
It’s fair to say I don’t feel Christmassy at all.. I think I’ve drank too much over the last few days.
Been a ****ty couple weeks in the piskie parents household. But we’re going to try and make it a good day tomorrow at least. My mum and dad are home together at least, get the feeling that this might be the last one with my dad at home.
Enjoy as much of it as you can mate, and count your blessings. Mind you, my mum's been predicting her last Christmas every year for the last 6 years. She's 84 and the smart money is on her making 90. Not so sure about my dad though - still half hoping he'll see Saints lift another trophy, but they'll need to get a shift on.
On the gin and ginger. Will have a couple of those and that'll be me sorted, chilled into Christmas. Could do without the constant Vbucks battle though. As things go, the biggest Christmas present in this house will be me deleting Fortnite.