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Off Topic Heres a joke for you all

Discussion in 'Queens Park Rangers' started by kiwiqpr, Feb 23, 2012.

  1. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member Staff Member

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    I was devastated to find out my wife was having an affair, but, by turning to religion, I was soon able to come to terms with the whole thing.

    I converted to Islam, and we're stoning her in the morning.........
     
    #3921
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  2. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member Staff Member

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    #3922
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  3. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member Staff Member

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    #3923
  4. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member Staff Member

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    #3924
  5. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member Staff Member

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    #3925
  6. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

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    dad of the year
     
    #3926
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  7. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member Staff Member

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    #3927
    Makemstine Roger, UTRs and kiwiqpr like this.
  8. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

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    Saudi man sentenced to 1,000 lashes for performing oral sex on a camel
    TOPICS:bestialitycrimehomosexualityoral sexsaudi arabiasex
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    Jizan | A 26-year-old Saudi Arabian man has been sentenced to 1,000 lashes and two months in jail after he allegedly performed oral sex on one of his employer’s camels, reports the Riyadh Herald this week.
    Abdullah al-Rashidi, 26, was tending to the herd of camels when he was caught performing a fellatio on one of the animals before local authorities were called in and proceeded to his arrest.
    Al-Rashidi’s employer first hesitated before calling the police but said he could not tolerate such an act of perversion before God and that his employee’s actions needed to be punished.
    “When I found him licking the camel’s penis, he first told me that he was drinking the sperm from the camel to cure his oral herpes infection,” his employer told the judge.
    “I then asked him where he had heard that swallowing the sperm of a camel was a cure for anything,” he explained, visibly concerned.
    “He then started crying and admitted that he just liked the taste. That is when I called the police,” his employer said in court.
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    Drinking camel urine is reputed to have many health benefits but sperm is not known to have any curative powers admit experts.
    A disgrace to God
    Judge Muhammad El Fehdi expressed his moral disgust towards the young man, warning him that he had not only disgraced himself but his entire family before God.
    “How ashamed your father and mother must be and how much they must regret giving birth to a son who enjoys fondling the genitals of camels,” the judge said in court.
    Al-Rashidi’s parents also pleaded the judge to give their son a harsh punishment so as to deter him from repeating the offense.
    “I already have to live with the shame of having a son who likes putting camel penises into his mouth, may this punishment at least scare him away from turning into a homosexual,” she pleaded the judge.
    Not the first time

    Under intense questioning from the judge, the defendant admitted that it was not his first offense but that he had taken part in such activities previously a number of times.
    “I don’t know why I did it. I knew it was wrong but I could not resist,” said the young man, bursting into tears.
    “Often sex with animals can lead to sleeping with human corpses or even worse, homosexuality,” the judge warned the defendant.
    “You are a young man who is starting your life, and so I will give you a light punishment, but if you are to repeat this immoral and disgraceful practice, next time I will be less lenient,” the judge told the young man.
    Abdullah al-Rashidi was sentenced to 1,000 lashes and two months in prison. According to Shariah law, in the case of bestiality, the animal becomes “unfit” and must be killed.
    He was also sentenced to pay SR 18,000 ($5,000 USD) to replace the worth of five of the camels he admitted having inappropriate relations with.
     
    #3928
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  9. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member Staff Member

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  10. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member Staff Member

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    Three hundred thousand BMWs have been recalled with a serious electrical fault.


    Apparently their indicators started working.......
     
    #3930
  11. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member Staff Member

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    #3931
  12. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member Staff Member

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    Trafalgar Square Fact - Not many know that Nelson was 5'6" in real life. His statue in the Square is 17'4".

    That's a Horatio of around 3 to 1 :)
     
    #3932
  13. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member Staff Member

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    UK WINS EUROVISION SONG CONTEST AFTER DIANE ABBOTT COUNTS THE VOTES !!

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    #3933
  14. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member Staff Member

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    #3934
  15. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member Staff Member

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  16. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

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    #3936
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  17. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

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    #3937
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  18. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

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    #3938
  19. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

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    #3939
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  20. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member Staff Member

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