It's health and safety I tell ya! In our day the 3 estates each had a bonfire and the game was to build and protect your own while trying to burn the others down early (We do bonfire over here on Halloween, because...well...at least half of us were probably rooting for Mr F...oh there's the king of bonfires on the 11th of July but again that's a bit nasty) It kept you busy for the month though. Mad max style raids, barbwire fences, being confused with an actual fox....almost burning your friend to death as he stupidly tried to light the bonfire from the inside with firelights while we forgot he was there, poured petrol around the outside and WOOOSH...big lad never ran that fast again in his life.. . #nostalgia
Is it still crapness? If so, on the fourth day of crapness my true love gave to me: Four Carling Brews Three French Fries Two turtle mochas And a bucket of KFC
Should be special brew lol. Maybe the dozy old **** will stop drinking piss water. At least if he is drinking special brew, have an excuse for being a ****ing accident prone cock
Evra's kick to the head of a fan reminds one of Cantona's kick at a fan. This latest lashout is likely to reignite the tired old refrain that footballers are bad role models. But which role model did both players learn this from? Cantona and Evra both played under Skidmark Ferguson, who once kicked a boot at Beckham, which hit him in the head. So yeah, bad role models should be kicked out of the game.
They all have one factual link so maybe the answer is to just eliminate Manchester United from existence? Or at the very least, only give them two subs in their next match
Cool. Just been asked to perform a wedding ceremony. I knew my Universal Life Church ordination would come in handy some day. Never officiated a wedding before, this should be fun.
it's been a week since I started feeling like **** and today is the worst I've felt so far! Just had an hours kip in the bath!!!
You must be so wrinkly after an hour in the bath it must be a preview of what you will look like when you are 80
7th day of Crapness. 7 Maids with Milkshakes 6 Greasy pizzas 5... GOLDEN... ARCHES... 4 Carling Brews 3 French Fries 2 Turtle Mochas And a bucket if KFC
Hamlet summed up in 3 limericks Prince Hamlet thought Claudius a traitor For having it off with his mater “To revenge dad or not?” Is the gist of the plot And he did - 9 soliloquies later. Said Ophelia, “Prince Hamlet’s a bore, He doesn’t love me any more. I’m all by myself - I’ll be left on the shelf Or go mad by the end of Act IV. Did Ophelia ask Hamlet to bed? Was Queen Gertrude incestuously wed? Is anything certain? By the fall of the curtain Almost everyone’s certainly dead.
Our local fireworks were meant to be on last night, though I was busy with something else. A couple of years ago there was a (very minor) accident so the safety elf has decided we have to have a pro do them now Professional pyrotechnician comes along, and sets everything up on the jetty. The tide comes in.
