We sat at home on the sofa last night and the conversation went like this... Mrs Z; "I've not got you anything for valentines by the way, I'm skint" Me; "good because I've got you ****all like every other year" Mrs Z; " " #romantic #truelove #howitshouldbe #excitingnight #greatconversationists
Mrs tries to make me feel guilty for not wanting to do/buy anything for Valantines day. She even woke me up at 5.30am to tell me that I dream cheated on her and proceeded to have a go at me when I didn't give a ****.
Sort of. This wasn't a bidet, it was a bidet attachment. You put it under the seat of the regular toilet, attach it to the water supply and then after you poop you stay seated, pull a lever and get your bum squirted on. Better than a real bidet in my opinion, no dropping poo all over the place whilst you move from toilet to bidet. Saves money too. No need for toilet paper... Besides one square to dry off with. Nothing like a nice fresh bum crack.
Shower head and sitting over the edge of the bath helped wonders when I couldn't see all the toilet paper stacked up behind me at my mates house once.
Just got 15 Valentines cards! It's left me completely breathless. That security guard at Clinton Cards gave quite a chase
Might get Mrs luv some chocolates and flowers tonight, I have a feeling they may be at a reduced price. #aftervalentinesdaysales