Firsts of the season ahead of the season. Score: Larsson Yellow card: Catts Red card: O'Shea Own goal: O'Shea Arrested: M'vila First to need an operation: Rodwell
Score: Lens Yellow card: Catts Red card: Catts Own goal: Jones Arrested: Adam Johnson. First to need an operation: Alvarez.
Score: Kaboul Yellow card: Larson Red card: Catts Own goal: Jones Arrested: Bridcut (for impersonating a footballer) First to need an operation: Giacherini
Score: Defoe Yellow card: Catts Red card: Catts (2nd yellow 1st game ) Own goal: O'Shea Arrested: Fletcher in a night club. First to need an operation: Alvarez
Firsts - Score: the Ref - ball rebounds of a beach ball first then hits the ref Red card: The beach ball Yellow card: Pantilimon for falling asleep during the Newcastle Game Own goal: Lens putting a goal past Pants to wake him up First to need an operation: Dick Advocaat ( treated for severe cauliflower ear ) as Mrs Advocaat was under the impression she'd get a weekly bouquet of roses Arrested: Mrs Advocaat for smacking her husband around the ear with a wooden clog