Police are appealing for witnesses after a particularly nasty bitch slap attack last night in the south side of Glasgow. Two men were seen to attack each other with handbags near the Georgic public house while a crowd of bystanders laughed like ****. Witnesses describe the scene as " Carnage - the place was littered wi clumps of hair,broken nails and blobs of mascara" Inspector Rocket from the Polis asks that anyone who seen 2 queerhawks scratching each other in the vicinity come forward as we cannae have the public treated to such a laughable display again.
a saw that on ma way down to meet Rab. some big militant **** with a leather jacket and puma joggies was tryin to stick his meatball footlong up some guys arse. maybe butcher thot it was me cos the poor **** was on his fone.
I can just picture Rab the builder wi his footlong ,his handlebar moustache and carrying a roll of gaffer tape and a snooker ball
