Yesterday, I went into my local B & Q store and this man in orange and brown comes over to me and asks me if I want decking. Luckily I got the first punch in, but you canât be too careful.
I was at a cashpoint yesterday and a frail little old lady asked me to check her balance for her - not being one to disappoint I pushed her over
My new girlfriend said it would be at least six months before she'd be interested in oral sex. I told her I fully understood and respected her decision.....I said I'd give her a call nearer the time !
One of the lads fitted a mirror to their bedroom ceiling but it came crashing down when the wife and him were shagging. Whilst in hospital the nurse said, "Who was on top?" "She was," He replied, "I see," said the nurse, "She has several lacerations to her head, back and legs, but could you explain how she managed to dislocate her jaw?" To which he replied "Nobody criticises my DIY."
Billy, are you the one that after visiting B&Q the other week for some 6 inch screws reported to management that a number of shelves had fallen down after unscrewing them?
