Referee: Howard Webb Linesmen: Clattenburg Young gains 10 penalties despite diving on the opposite end of the pitch. Rooney fails to convert all ten...on the first second, third, fourth and fifth attempt but clattenburg deems cech to be off his line for all....a frustrated and exhausted cech kicks the ball into the back of the net which Webb declares to be a legal penalty despite the ball going out of play prior. Chelsea get two men sent of for simulation despite being hacked to the ground by Ferdinand via sledge hammer. Rvp get 26 goals despite being half the pitch behind the last defender slotting the ball into an empty net whilst cech is being restrained by a determined clattenburg. Webb sends cech off for abusing the linesmen in subsequent to the final whistle. Match ends 36-0 to Manu. Chelsea submit a complaint to FIFA accusing cllatenrburg of calling cech white which is immediately dismissed on the grounds that cech is clearly black on having his head examined! Chelsea are then demoted to non league football wherein roman intervenes and purchases FIFA, declares a direct inversion of the football league system (prem becomes non league and non league becomes prem etc) and fires the Webb-clattenburg duo. Chelsea declared prem champions 2012-2013. Moral of the story: refs aren't as influential as roman!
