When I was on holiday in Egypt last summer, some Egyptian fellow in the car in front beeped his horn & bared his naked bum at me out of the window. I thought, ‘Bloody toot and car moon.’
I was offered sex with a Victoria's Secret model. In exchange, I had to advertise some kind of bathroom cleaner on my Facebook page. Of course I declined as I'm a man of high morals and standards and strong will power. Just as strong as Ajax, the incredibly strong bathroom cleaner. Available in Lemon scent and Vanilla.........
There was bad news this week as I was forced to shut down my dating agency for chickens. I was struggling to make hens meet.....
I hear that HMV are closing their classical music stores... apparently too many people get their Chopin online.
A man told his doctor that he wasn"t able to do all the things around the house that he used to do. When the check-up was complete, he said, "Now, Doc, I can take it. Tell me in plain English what is wrong with me." "Well, in plain English," the doctor said, "you"re just lazy." "Okay," said the man. "Now give me the medical term so I can tell my wife."
