3 desperately ill men go to their doctor seeking help: One is an alcoholic, One is a chain smoker and the other is gay. The doctor tells the men if you indulge in any of your bad habits again you will die. So the 3 men leave, the alcoholic sees a pub and hears its loud music and can't resist. He orders a shot of whisky drinks it and suddenly drops down dead. The other 2 men walk out side realising how serious this is. Then the chain smoker sees a half a cigarette on the ground still burning so the gay guy says to the chain smoker.... "If you bend over to pick that up, you know were both dead."
The speed in which a woman says 'nothing' when asked 'whats wrong?' Is inversely proportional to severity of the coming storm.