To Be A Normal Person……. I used to think I was pretty much just a regular person, but I was born white, into a two-parent household which now, whether I like it or not, makes me privileged, a racist, and responsible for slavery. I am a fiscal and moral conservative, which by today's standards, makes me a fascist because I plan, budget, and support myself. I went to Grammar School and have always held a job. But I now find out that I am not here because I earned it, but because I was "advantaged". I am heterosexual, which according to gay folks, now makes me a homophobe. I am not a Muslim, which now labels me as an infidel I am older than 70, making me a useless dinosaur who doesn't understand Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, or Snapchat. I think, and I reason, and I doubt most of what the 'mainstream' media tells me, which makes me a Right-wing conspiracy nut I am proud of my heritage and our inclusive culture, making me a xenophobe. I believe in hard work, fair play, and fair reward according to each individual's merits, which today makes me an anti-socialist. I believe our system guarantees freedom of effort - not freedom of outcome or subsidies which must make me a borderline sociopath. I believe in the defence and protection of my nation for and by all citizens, now making me a militant. I am proud of our flag, what it stands for, and the many who died to let it fly, so I stand during our National Anthem - I must be a radical. Please help me come to terms with the new me because I'm just not sure who I am anymore! Funny - it all took place over the last decade! If all this nonsense wasn't enough to deal with, now I don't even know which toilet to use.. and these days I go more frequently!
WHAT A WAN**R Sperm donor who fathered 550 children ordered to stop Published 13 hours ago By Emily McGarvey BBC News A Dutch man suspected of fathering more than 550 children worldwide through sperm donations has been ordered to stop. The man named Jonathan, aged 41, could be fined more than €100,000 (£88,000) if he tries to donate again. He was banned from donating to fertility clinics in the Netherlands in 2017 after it emerged he had fathered more than 100 children. But instead of stopping he carried on donating sperm abroad and online. A court in The Hague has told him to provide a list of all the clinics he had used and to order them to destroy his sperm. The man was said to have misled hundreds of women. Dutch clinical guidelines state that a donor should not father more than 25 children in 12 families. But judges said the man had helped produce between 550 and 600 children since he began donating sperm in 2007. He was taken to court by a foundation protecting donor children's rights, and by the mother of one of the children allegedly fathered from his sperm. "The point is that this kinship network with hundreds of half-brothers and half-sisters is much too large," a spokesman for the court, Gert-Mark Smelt, said. Over 100 of the children fathered by the man were born in Dutch clinics and others privately, but he also donated to a Danish clinic which dispatched his semen to addresses in various countries. Dutch fertility doctor fathered 49 children IVF doctor accused of using own sperm Judge Thera Hesselink said the court "prohibits the defendant from donating his semen to new prospective parents after the issuing of this judgment". The man is also not permitted to contact any prospective parents "with the wish that he was willing to donate semen… advertise his services to prospective parents or join any organisation that establishes contact between prospective parents", the judge said. The donor "deliberately misinformed" prospective parents about the number of children he had already fathered in the past, the district court in The Hague said. "All these parents are now confronted with the fact that the children in their family are part of a huge kinship network, with hundreds of half-siblings, which they did not choose," it said. The court said it was "sufficiently plausible" that this has or could have negative psychosocial consequences for the children. Sperm donors are told to limit the number of times they offer their services, to reduce the chance that siblings might unknowingly form a couple and have children together. The Netherlands has been hit by fertility scandals in the past. In 2019, a Dutch fertility doctor accused of using his own sperm to inseminate patients without their consent was confirmed as the father of 49 children.
WHAT A WAN**R Sperm donor who fathered 550 children ordered to stop Published 13 hours ago By Emily McGarvey BBC News A Dutch man suspected of fathering more than 550 children worldwide through sperm donations has been ordered to stop. The man named Jonathan, aged 41, could be fined more than €100,000 (£88,000) if he tries to donate again. He was banned from donating to fertility clinics in the Netherlands in 2017 after it emerged he had fathered more than 100 children. But instead of stopping he carried on donating sperm abroad and online. A court in The Hague has told him to provide a list of all the clinics he had used and to order them to destroy his sperm. The man was said to have misled hundreds of women. Dutch clinical guidelines state that a donor should not father more than 25 children in 12 families. But judges said the man had helped produce between 550 and 600 children since he began donating sperm in 2007. He was taken to court by a foundation protecting donor children's rights, and by the mother of one of the children allegedly fathered from his sperm. "The point is that this kinship network with hundreds of half-brothers and half-sisters is much too large," a spokesman for the court, Gert-Mark Smelt, said. Over 100 of the children fathered by the man were born in Dutch clinics and others privately, but he also donated to a Danish clinic which dispatched his semen to addresses in various countries. Dutch fertility doctor fathered 49 children IVF doctor accused of using own sperm Judge Thera Hesselink said the court "prohibits the defendant from donating his semen to new prospective parents after the issuing of this judgment". The man is also not permitted to contact any prospective parents "with the wish that he was willing to donate semen… advertise his services to prospective parents or join any organisation that establishes contact between prospective parents", the judge said. The donor "deliberately misinformed" prospective parents about the number of children he had already fathered in the past, the district court in The Hague said. "All these parents are now confronted with the fact that the children in their family are part of a huge kinship network, with hundreds of half-siblings, which they did not choose," it said. The court said it was "sufficiently plausible" that this has or could have negative psychosocial consequences for the children. Sperm donors are told to limit the number of times they offer their services, to reduce the chance that siblings might unknowingly form a couple and have children together. The Netherlands has been hit by fertility scandals in the past. In 2019, a Dutch fertility doctor accused of using his own sperm to inseminate patients without their consent was confirmed as the father of 49 children.
When Ralph first noticed that his penis was growing larger and staying erect longer, he was delighted, as was his wife. But after several weeks, his penis had grown to nearly twenty inches. Ralph became quite concerned. He was having problems dressing, and even walking. So he and his wife went to see a prominent urologist. After an initial examination, the doctor explained to the couple that, though rare, Ralph's condition could be fixed through corrective surgery. "How long will Ralph be on crutches?" the wife asked anxiously. "Crutches? Why would he need crutches?" responded the surprised doctor. "Well," said the wife coldly, "you're gonna lengthen his legs, aren't you?
A husband and wife who worked for the circus went to an adoption agency. The social worker raised doubts about their suitability. The couple then produced photos of their 50-foot motor home, which was clean and well maintained, and equipped with a beautiful nursery. The social worker then raised concerns about the education a child would receive while in the couple's care. "We've arranged for a full-time tutor who will teach the child all the usual subjects along with French, Mandarin, and computer skills." Then the social worker expressed concern about a child being raised in a circus environment. "Our nanny will be a certified expert in pediatric care, welfare, and diet." The social worker was finally satisfied and asked, "What age child are you hoping to adopt?" "Oh, It doesn't really matter, as long as the kid fits in the cannon."
A man asks a farmer near a field, “Sorry sir, would you mind if I crossed your field instead of going around it? You see, I have to catch the 4:23 train.” The farmer says, “Sure, go right ahead. And if my bull sees you, you’ll even catch the 4:11
Today I donated my watch, phone and £100, to some poor guy. You don’t know the happiness I felt when he put the knife back in his pocket!
An Atheist was hiking in North America when suddenly a grizzly bear burst out of the woods, the Athiest trips and the bear rears up over him lifts it’s paw about to strike when the Athiest cries out “god help me” everything stops and god’s voice comes from the clouds saying “you’ve denied my existence your whole life why should I help you now” the Athiest says “you’re right it would be hypocritical of me to ask for your help now but could you make the bear a Catholic?” God agrees when everything starts again the bear lowers its paw falls to it’s knees joins its paws together and says “for what we’re about to receive......”
