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Off Topic Jokes thread

Discussion in 'Portsmouth' started by devonFRATTONiser, Jan 25, 2015.

  1. antipodean exile

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  3. antipodean exile

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  4. antipodean exile

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  6. antipodean exile

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  8. antipodean exile

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  11. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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  13. antipodean exile

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  14. antipodean exile

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  15. antipodean exile

    antipodean exile Well-Known Member

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    Don Carlos is 90 years old and lives in an old age retirement nursing home.
    Every night after dinner, he secludes himself at the far-end of the garden.
    One night, Juanita, 80 years old, approaches him. They start chatting about life and old age, and after a while, he says to her,
    "You know what I miss most of all ?"
    *What ?" asks Juanita.
    "SEX !!!" says Don Carlos.
    Juanita laughed and exclaimed,
    "You horny old man, but you couldn't get it up even if they pointed a gun at your head!"
    "I know*, he said, "but I would love for a woman to hold it for me, if only for a while.'
    "Well, I can help you with that," said Juanita; and she unzips his zipper, gently takes out his little member and holds it in her hand.
    Don Carlos' face was one of sheer pleasure !
    They agree to meet secretly in the garden every night, where they would sit and chat, and Juanita would hold his member during that time.
    One night, however, Don Carlos did not appear at their garden hideout at the agreed time.
    Alarmed, Juanita began looking all over for him to make sure he was okay.
    She ended up finding him sitting on the edge of the swimming pool, next to Catalina, a 85 year old woman, who was holding his member.
    Absolutely furious, Juanita screamed at him.
    "YOU TRAITOR, BASTARD, SON OF A BITCH !!!
    WHAT DOES THAT CATALINA HAVE THAT I DON'T HAVE ???"
    Don Carlos, with all the pleasure on his face, replied,
    "PARKINSONS !!!"
     
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  16. antipodean exile

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  17. antipodean exile

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  18. antipodean exile

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  19. antipodean exile

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  20. antipodean exile

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