God (in the Garden of Eden):”This is Eve, your mate.” Adam “Ok but who’s that?” and he points to an old man smoking a ciggie. God: “Oh that’s Keith Richards, he was here when I got here.”
I went to the supermarket helpdesk, and said to the assistant "I've just bought some deodorant, and two bodyguards followed me back to my car, what's going on??". He said "You've got 24 hour protection mate".
