Harry Maguire

Is it really obvious that I'm on the train back from London and have already finished a bottle of wine?

 

Your mum told me enough times.

 

are you sure you're not looking at men on your phone thinking it's on the front camera?

 

Are you a necrophiliac? She's dead.

 

I wanted to like your post then realised your mum has died so I didn't like.
Is it time to get out of this ****-hole yet?

 

You'd be surprised how many ladies like the no so good-looking guys and I should know

 

Of course she doesn't try, she is stunning.
Shes nearly as fit as Ms Over18

 

think you need to cool off in a shower

 

That looks wrong. So terribly wrong.

Awful stuff.

 

I've just googled Kane's girlfriend to check her out and she looks really normal to me.

Good luck to em.

 

You are right, it's ****ing boiling here.

 

Can you get a banning order for googling a bird

 

Just in case Fifth Harmony are reading.... I would happily jizz on any of your faces.

 

I'd be happy just to jizz on their faeces.

 

Great for Leicester - strange move for Maguire.

I think I just puked a bit.

 

when she does not get done up she actually looks like a chav.
he can keep her

 

Yeah exactly. Not sure why everyone was ****ing about her.

I've had a lot better.

Today.

 

... there's always one ...

 

**** me, has some **** photoshopped Harry into into a Lesster shirt?