All we need now is a bullshit flag for every time some nugget shares a "3 broon guys tried to take my wean today by looking at her" status and Facebook might almost be bearable.
I toured the USA extensively during my time as Genesis' bass player. The Americans are definitely gullible; after all, they used to pay sixty bucks each to come and watch the ****e we were churning out night after night.
I hope they'll also be flagging Daily Mail and Daily Express articles for the hard of thinking. Here's a Daily Express bingo game. http://expressbingo.org.uk/
I stepped in for Darryl during the Turn It On Again tour. He'd damaged his hands during a frenzied bout of stir frying and, as a result, was unable to play certain riffs. Basically, I shadowed Darryl throughout the tour and earned 50% of his wages. A similar thing happened during the 70s when Steve Hackett lost his thumb opening a can of corned-beef. I've also played for Boston, the Eagles and Bros.
The only Genesis song I've actually got time for. As for Bros, did they pay you in full? Apparently, they owe you nothing, HEARAWN, nothing at all.
I'm a man of the world. I think I'd be ok in America - 53% of the population appear to be stupid, and therefore would be easier pickings for my capitalistic ways.
I've often thought the same. I've been offered work in the US a coupla times and so far I've knocked it back. Luckily I knocked back work in New Orleans just before the hurricane visited. I was also offered work in Georgia, and Seattle. When I say I knocked it back what I really mean is the ex missus knocked it back.
I was looking at a role in San Francisco last year but the place has London prices which put me off. Although, talking about London prices, I've been offered three different jobs in Dublin in the last week and there's a good chance I might take one of them - look at the state of this, and that's out in the sticks http://www.daft.ie/lettings/castlefield-way-castlefield-manor-knocklyon-dublin/1499265/ near €20k a year to rent a wee ****e 3 bedroom semi Where's Mick O Toon to tell me where all the skint people and their families live?
The unfortunate thing about America is that that part of the population that is smart, is, like, really smart. They can do stuff like landing men on the moon and coming up with an endless stream of highly innovative ways to kill other human beings. It doesn't really matter that the vast majority of them possess a brain the size of a walnut. What matters is that those who went to school, paid attention in class and managed to avoid the hail of bullets flying around the playground on a daily basis have built an incredibly hi-tech society that is pretty much the most advanced on the planet. Luckily for you Mick, there are plenty of numb-nuts Yanks around for you to shamelessly exploit. Happy hunting, you Capitalist swine, you..!!
I'm a bit ambivalent about hoax news and satire. Having said that though, I've heard that Facebook are to create a new workplace network for total ****heads. A spokesman told this reporter that they largely expect to recruit twats and went on to say that its principle purpose was to create a social network for pretentious ****s who mostly write in crayon and use words like "'interface' instead of 'combine' like normal people. Businesses gave the idea a slightly warmer than lukewarm reception. “I’m sick of looking at mobile phone videos of Essex girls selfies with C list celebs on Strictly Come Dancing. I want something seriously pretentious that I can show to people and they'll think I'm really clever. I made a graph yesterday that meant **** all but looked so good that I got a hard on. I want to share that with people. The graph that is, not the hard on". One potential user said "I'm a high achieving professional sociopath and I want a site that enables me to come up with a presentation full of all sorts of meaningless drivel nobody can understand, that will demonstrate that it's essential for my company to sack all the cleaners". People who are not involved in business were less enthusiastic. Arthur Putey, 58, who drives a baker's van said "Haven't Facebook got anything better to do than provide yuppie numpties with yet another excuse to come up with moronic mission statements?" Warning: This article may or may not be a spoof.
