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Brilliant

Discussion in 'Sunderland' started by SAFCOL, Aug 5, 2011.

  1. SAFCOL

    SAFCOL Member

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    Love the Daily Mash. http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/sport...ine-up-to-tell-Barton-to-do-one-201108044156/

    Clubs line up to tell Barton to do one

    NEWCASTLE United have admitted they have been deluged with offers from clubs wanting to show Joey Barton exactly where the sun does not shine.

    Barton watches as Sam Allardyce holds up a piece of paper saying 'cock off'
    Barton had the final year of his contract terminated when start-of-season medical tests showed he was still an arsehole. He is now the subject of an intense bidding war amongst managers eager to dance around him flicking the V sign.

    Newcastle chairman Mike Ashley said: "We’ve had a delegation from the Kingdom of Tonga arrive asking if they can wave their bottoms at him and then go home again. We're even getting club owners from other sports asking if they can discuss having nothing to do with him."

    Barton is currently training on his own in a viewing pen several miles from St James Park and Ashley has tried to recoup some money from his departure by charging managers to watch him forlornly trudge up and down, shouting abuse at the training cones.

    A small restaurant has been set up next to the pen, as well as a souvenir stand featuring shirts saying 'My Manager Went To Newcastle & All He Got Was To Tell Joey Barton To Go **** Himself'.

    But the biggest windfall could come from an unprecedented £15m up-yours bid from Manchester City, which would break the British spending record for telling a player to piss up a rope.

    Roberto Mancini said: "We're going to buy four airships, decorated by Banksy and fitted with loudspeakers playing Bigmouth Strikes Again.

    "Once we know we’ve got his attention they will fly in formation so they spell out the phrase 'In your dreams, you gobshite twat'.

    "I think it shows once and for all the level of ambition at this great club."
     
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  2. overseasTOON

    overseasTOON Active Member

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    Arsene Wenger has confirmed that he and his French players did send a heart felt 'encule vous" to Barton who replied back via Twatter with his personal contact details and stated he'd love to.
     
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  3. SAFCOL

    SAFCOL Member

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    HAhaha
     
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  4. Alfie

    Alfie Active Member

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    Very good. <laugh>
     
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  5. MrRAWhite

    MrRAWhite Well-Known Member

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    Great read marra..<ok>
     
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  6. simonbh7

    simonbh7 Active Member

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  7. PrisonBroken

    PrisonBroken Member

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  8. safc1978

    safc1978 Well-Known Member

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    I could get him a job out in USA.

    If he was allowed in :police::bandit:
     
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  9. TheLittleGeordie

    TheLittleGeordie Active Member

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    Please don't put an article with the title 'brilliant' on the Newcastle board. We get excited because we think there may actually be some good news for once
     
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  10. SAFCOL

    SAFCOL Member

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    Sorry marra, it is funny though. Thought it might brighten your little geordie day. ;)
     
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  11. SAFCOL

    SAFCOL Member

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    Really brilliant, check out the tags for this thread. I'm getting to somebody. :emoticon-0103-cool::emoticon-0102-bigsm:emoticon-0102-bigsm:emoticon-0102-bigsm
     
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  12. Badgers Assemble

    Badgers Assemble Well-Known Member

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    Surly not good news?
     
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  13. SAFCOL

    SAFCOL Member

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    Possibly my favourite tag so far, *op has a monomoob* Pure genius. :emoticon-0102-bigsm:emoticon-0102-bigsm:emoticon-0102-bigsm
     
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  14. overseasTOON

    overseasTOON Active Member

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    Ta.

    I was only joking. You have a fine pair :)
     
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  15. SAFCOL

    SAFCOL Member

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    It's true, I do. ;)
     
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  16. Commachio

    Commachio Rambo 2021

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    Good article........but i would still not be dissapointed if we got him........twat yes, good player? without a doubt.
     
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  17. MagpieMuzz

    MagpieMuzz Active Member

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