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Sunderland put up for sale?

Discussion in 'Newcastle United' started by Albert's Chip Shop, Nov 30, 2016.

  1. Albert's Chip Shop

    Albert's Chip Shop Top Grafter
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    #1
  2. NUFCBRONX

    NUFCBRONX Active Member

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    I bid negative 50,000 Quatloos.
     
    #2
    J. J. McClure likes this.
  3. Heed

    Heed well known cheat

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    Its also close to the tourist resort of Pennywell-on-Sea.
     
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  4. Obi Wan

    Obi Wan keeper of the peace
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    Well... errr....ooh, I know, it...no wait...ummm...

    It has lots of pink seats - if you like that kind of thing

    If you have just £20 in your pocket, you'll be classed as rich

    You don'tneed to have any teeth to blend in

    You get a free fredor with every club purchase
     
    #4
  5. JakartaToon

    JakartaToon Well-Known Member
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    Get Mike to buy them and then make them our reserve team.
     
    #5
  6. JakartaToon

    JakartaToon Well-Known Member
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    Guaranteed 64million quid in parachute payments starting next year plus around 98million for finishing bottom this year. Add on the resale value of the current squad means you are probably looking at around 165million quid in potential revenue for next 4 years.
     
    #6
  7. Warmir Pouchov

    Warmir Pouchov Better than JPF

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    Its probably quite attractive in some ways. It has PL status. It was a steady fanbase for 75-85mins of each game. It has a good academy and training facility. The money from the PL. Its close to a major city and the economic centre of the North.

    On the downside it needs a complete overhaul in staff and players to change a terrible inbred outlook of failure. There is something wrong there as all the building blocks are in place. Shorts problem is he takes baby steps. It needs someone to walk in, throw money at it short term, and rip up the infrastructure of people to start again. They lurch from one thing to the next, shooting themselves in the foot along the way with bad publicity. Each manager comes out with the same "this will take time, it can't be changed overnight". That holds them back - they need some brash ****er to say "actually I can change this overnight and I will spend money to do so". Its so deeply ingrained, gradual is not going to work. Obviously I hope that doesn't happen and they get Vincent Tan.

    Essentially they need a doer.

    please log in to view this image
     
    #7
  8. Fork Handles

    Fork Handles Well-Known Member

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    Here's a dilemma for you. If you could wish a Vincent Tan type owner on Sunderland would you? Personally I think my dislike of tosspot owners is greater than my dislike of Sunderland doing well. Hoping they get decent owner is another thing though.
     
    #8
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  9. jimileysbaldhead

    jimileysbaldhead Well-Known Member

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    I thought the local council was cracking down on car boot sales.
     
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  10. Toon_Man_Sam1

    Toon_Man_Sam1 Well-Known Member

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    I bid £50m with a further £150m if I manage to keep the sunderland up!

    I promise I will not sell all of their players and just play the youth team
    I promise not to sack all the staff
    I promise not use cost saving initiatives like no more electricity use and no more furniture
    I promise not to sell absolutely everything that isn't nailed down.
    I also wont pick the team and put Jermain Defoe in goal!
    I might change their kit to a lucky black and white colour and re-name the team Newcastle's b1tches
     
    #10

  11. It's_all_Greek_to_me

    It's_all_Greek_to_me Well-Known Member

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    It's a bit like applying to University. You apply to Durham, Newcastle or Northumbria. If they turn you down you go to Sunderland because you want to say you have a University degree even though it's inferior.
     
    #11
  12. Toon_Man_Sam1

    Toon_Man_Sam1 Well-Known Member

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    I think one appealing aspect sunderland has is that its within close proximity of the metropolitan city of Newcastle.
     
    #12
  13. Warmir Pouchov

    Warmir Pouchov Better than JPF

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    Is this not just another ready made excuse for Ellis not spending money? The timing is impeccable...

    I recognise this from another club...can't quite put my finger on it.

    It does make me chuckle. Lauded by the majority of their fans for years, telling us what we were missing because of our twatful owner. All the while Short has just sat quietly thanking the high heavens for Mike Ashley. What is his trade? Investments? Venture capitalist? Something along those lines. It almost looks like he has been sitting on Sunderland doing just enough until it became a good time to make a profit. I'm sure he'll say he has lost money. When he sells, he'll be in profit. They've been had. All I can say is...<laugh><laugh><laugh><laugh><laugh><laugh><laugh><laugh><laugh><laugh>
     
    #13
  14. jimileysbaldhead

    jimileysbaldhead Well-Known Member

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    " Now then, lot number 15 Sunderland Football Club, we have a reserve of a bag of cheesy chips and a gobble off big Mary from Fredor's hareem.
    You sir, yes the man holding up 12 fingers, is that a bid or the number of points you'll get this season.
    Going once, going twice, sold to the poor F@cker who opened up a passport office in Sunderland after Big Sam told everyone he could get by the normal rules and get the knuckledraggers into Europe.
     
    #14
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  15. daztoc

    daztoc Well-Known Member

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    This is quite an interesting point actually. Lets say you did a deal for 150 million. Get relegated, so Short forfeits his 'bonus', get the parachute payments, sell the whole first team and basically liquidate all of the clubs assets. I wonder if you could walk away with cheeky 10 - 20 million in your pocket? Not a bad return on investment.
     
    #15

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