Bill Fotherby, the then chairman was supposed to go to the 1994 World Cup and come back with Asprilla but thought he knew better and decided to sign Tomas Brolin instead
Geordie phoned his mother in law and told her that her daughter had been rushed into the hospital and was about to give birth. His Mother In Law asked if she was dilated “ah don’t know about her, cos she’s off her head on gas & air right now” Geordie replied, “but am over the bloody moon”
A woman goes into a hairdressers in Gateshead and says "Can I have a perm please". The hairdresser replies "Yes of course. I wander lonely as a cloud....."
A small zoo in Newcastle acquired a very rare species of gorilla. Within a few weeks the gorilla, a female, became very difficult to handle. Upon examination, the veterinarian determined the problem. The gorilla was in season. To make matters worse, there was no male gorilla available. Thinking about their problem, the Zoo Keeper thought of Geordie Elliott, a local lad & part-time worker responsible for cleaning the animal cages. Geordie, like many Newcastle men, felt he had ample ability to satisfy any female. The Zoo Keeper thought they might have a solution. Geordie was approached with a proposition. Would he be willing to mate with the gorilla for £500? Geordie showed some interest, but said he would have to think the matter over carefully. The following day, he announced that he would accept their offer, but only under four conditions: 1. "First", Geordie said, "Nee kissin’ on the lips." The Keeper quickly agreed to this condition. 2. "Second", he said, "Ye cannit nivva tell neebody aboot this." The Keeper again readily agreed to this condition. 3. "Third", Geordie said, "Ah want all the bairns raised as Newcastle fans." Once again it was agreed. 4. "And last of all", Geordie stated, "You Gotta givvus another week to come up with the £500"
Shame Paul as I've got a ton on the gays to win the championship @ 7's & 50 e/w @ 13/2. Looking good so far but a long way to go yet so we'll see.
Can you think of anyone that might like this for Xmas? https://teespring.com/lfwrn?ad=uk_m55br_er#pid=377&cid=100074&sid=front
Heyup WJ, I see your having fun with the Loon. I think this guy might be related to Keegan who was also easy to wind up, that interview he gave after red nose wound him up was a classic
