Press Conference

theres supposed to be a press conference at some point today. anybody know when or if we can watch/listen to it live anywhere?

what do you reckon they'll say?

"barnetta is being unreasonable with his wage demands..." translates "we want to him to take a pay cut to move himself and his family to a totally different country to play for a team on the slide..."

or

"Jose wants champions league football" translates "we'll sell him to ANYONE willing to pay for him"

or "i wanted joey to stay" translates "joey has got his wish by p*ssing everybody off"

 

"We have some great news for supporters, we have managed to finalise the departures of Jose Enrique and Joey Barton. This has brought in some much needed funds to me and Dereks savings for S&M gear. A small amount has gone to one Pukka Pies. This is a private deal and I do not wish to disclose the nature of it. All I will say on the matter is mmmmmmmmm yum yum.

We hope the fans understand that after these outlays there is very little left for transfers. As it stands we probably don't need any new players as we have Paul Dummett for left back, Brad Inman for right midfield, and Sammy Ameobi. The latter is already a fans favourite and we don't want to hold him back. As such we've handed him the number 9 shirt which we know is very important to the club. He has promised us he will not be lazy and fall around like a clown every week like other members of his family. We believe him.

We're looking forward to the season ahead and I'm sure you are too. We believe with our squad, Alan's managerial skills and your support, we can qualify for Europe. Exciting times."

 

It's at 2pm, doubt it's watchable anywhere though

 

It will prob be on SSN

 

i'm genuinely curious to see what the hell he has to say, although i'm bracing myself for the inevitable "we're defo trying and we will get someone in for sure..."

"barton? ...no comment"

"Enrique? ...no comment"

 

Oh this definitely!

But that's what he always says...

 

How do you know there is one and that it is at 2pm? Source?

 

http://twitter.com/MsiDouglas/statuses/99087006876958720

"Confusion reigns at SJP! Let's see if 2pm presser sheds any light at all."

 

i read it somewhere this morning, might have been the journal. I couldn't remember when it was meant to be though. that being said they usually are around 2pm when they do happen so its seems to reasonable to expect it then.

it'll probably be the pre game conference for the Fiorentina match at the weekend. nothing unusual about that either.

 

I am losing hours of my days now looking online for news about the toon in the hope that we get some good news. Would make my weekend if the press conference was about us signing Barnetta and Sturridge. I really like Sturridge as a player and think he is only going to get better. Even if it was on loan.

 

Just saw wee Davey Craig on SSN advising it was on at 14:00 today .. he said it is supposed to be about the Fiorentina match, but more likey to be the Joey Barton show ..

 

It will be the same as any other press conference. He says the same things like "We are in for players but I can't go into detail". We just want to know wtf is going on!!

 

anybody know a site that streams sky sports news?

 

Sky Go if you have a sub with them - PC or Apple OS - no android yet which is a bit **** .. (and are not blocked at work or anything)

 

Breaking news:
Newcastle and Joey Barton will be making no further statements on the player’s future. More to follow…


Looks like Pardew will not be talking about Barton at the press conference. Shocker.

 

breaking news?? hardly.

can't watch sky go at work and its firewalled. i also have an android phone so can't get t on that either.

anyone with access to the presser on their computer care to keep us mere mortals up to scratch with some live updates??

 

I can see Barton gatecrashing the conference to put across his side of the story.

Ranger, who, attempting to get back in Pardew and Ashley's good books has been lurking behind the scenes waiting for his opportunity, rugby tackles Barton before he can get to a microphone.

In the ensuing confusion Barton "accidentally" stubs his cigar our in Ranger's eye (he was really aiming for the tattoo on his lip)

In his panic to escape the melee, Ashley trips over a box of Greggs pies and lands gut-first on that well known and much respected journalist (okay, maybe "anti Toon lieing bitch" may be a more accurate description) Louise Taylor's face, making her look like Steve Bruce's twin sister.

Llambias finds it so funny that he literally pisses himself and is forced to remove his trousers, revealing red silk french knickers, a matching suspender belt and black stockings. Seeing all the media and journos staring at him he screams "what's wrong, is red not my best colour?" and disappears into the ladies toilets, weeping.

Pardew slowly picks up a microphone and says "Obviously we are working very, very, hard to bring in one or two new faces before the start of the season, but it's not easy, transfers nowadays are complicated and take time. I have spoken to Jose and he understands the club's situation as we understand his. We are looking forward to the new season and we are ahead of the game."

Just another quiet day at SJP.

 

Being a journo for SSN must be easy. The last 5 or 6 NUFC headlines are them just reporting what Barton has tweeted. Tomorrow it'll be Sky Sources: Barton has toast for breakfast