Here are some of the brilliant hashtags and one liners I've seen over the last few days following Jesus signing for us #jesusisageordie remember that time he fed 5000 people with 5 stottie cakes and 2 tubs of pease pudding For all the atheists out there here is a picture of Jesus and God please log in to view this image Hearing that Jesus was signed in one last effort to heal Siem De Jong We all said we needed someone who would put his life on the line to save the team I'd love to see us draw Chelsea in the Cup. Just imagine Moses v Jesus. Could be an interesting battle on the right flank. Feel free to add more.
Jesus walks into Malmaison with a hammer and a bag of nails.... 'Please can you put me up for the night?'
On the never going to happen logic that reminds me of the old classic joke a man was walking along Roker beach and stumbled across an old lamp. he picked it up and rubbed it and out popped a genie. the genie said "ok, ok. you released me from the lamp, blah blah blah. this is the fourth time this month and i'm getting a little sick of these wishes so you can forget about three. you only get one wish!" the man sat and thought about it for a while and said "i've always wanted to go to hawaii but i'm scared to fly and i get very seasick. could you build me a bridge to hawaii so i can drive over there to visit?" the genie laughed and said "thats impossible. think of the logistics of that! how would the supports ever reach the bottom of the pacific? think of how much concrete... how much steel! no, think of another wish." the man said ok and tried to think of a really good wish. finally, he said "I wish that Sunderland win the Premier League next season" the genie said "you want that bridge two lanes or four?"
