When the weather is high. Da ba de, da ba de, da ba do. Annoying song. But as things warm up for the summertime, what pros and cons does it bring? Pros. Well its warmer for starters. Hot birds in cute little hotpants and vests. More daylight hours. Cons. Fat mingers in hotpants and vests. Think they look like Jessica Alba, when in reality they look like Susan Boyle in an Umpa Lumpa outfit. Bees the size of a Zepplin airship. Wasp and Hornets that sound like an Apache attack helicopter and pack a similar amount of firepower. Evil twats. Spiders the size of a large dog. Just sat there staring at you with their beady ****ing eyes and killer fangs. Ants. Millions of the ****ers, goose stepping down the path, like SS soldiers in pitboots.
I was alright until they introduced oil rape seed in the eighties (the farmers were getting a subsidy from the EU to grow it) - that yellow stuff in the fields I can taste it a couple of miles away. I cough like hell eyes,watering nose running and when its really bad I have difficulty breathing properly
Yuk. BBQ's any excuse to light a fire and eat burnt burgers and get ****faced. And cause loads of smoke when its finished. Top stuff.
cons - cat waking me up at 4:30 cos it's light and time to go a-hunting. - thinking i've got loads of evening left cos it's still light outside when it's actually 9pm. - midges. itchy lil bastards. - my car doesn't have air-con. - kids off school. pros - better football weather - football tournament every other year - music festivals a-plenty
Midges seve zero purpose like wasps. They are just there to annoy, bite or sting **** out if you. The devils creatures.
Pros. You just know what's coming.......... You can play golf from silly o'clock in the morning until late. Agree, nice creatures in skimpy outfits. summer holidays. BBQ's. just love em, nice crispy sausages and burgers, food of the gods lol. Cons. Still have to go to work. Overheating in sweaty office.
Zlatan here's a tip for you if you want to stop the midges - I know a lot of lads who work in the countryside in places were the midges are at their worst and they swear by Jimmy Choo perfume. Just a few dabs all over your body and it keeps the midges away (obviously your bollocks will have to fend for themselves)
So its a choicr of being eaten alive or smelling like Julian Clary at a gay pride march? Lets get mincing.
Seriously though there is something they reckon f**ks the midges right off - I'll find out what it is and post it up later
