What have you crazy guise got planned this weekend? Not that I really give a ****, but I will tell you what I am going to do. After last weekends disappointment of not finding a midget hooker in the Malaga area, I found one in Barcelona so I shall be going there tomorrow to pump her wee midget fanny. Sunday, I might go to the beach.
I plan on celebrating another SNP victory by watching Braveheart on a loop whilst rubbing a picture of Nicola on ma sporran.
BBQ and thereafter getting tanked up in the company of my merry band of associates, an Irishman, a Scotsman, an Iranian, a Spaniard, two Canadians, a Frisian and one token Australian to fulfil the requirements of local by-laws.
Do you actually mean a friesian or are you sticking with Frisian? Friesians probably have a better sense of humour.
You can then pretend to have a massive cock, whilst ****ing a child sized female. You're for the ****in watching ...
After the SNP victory I am leaving the country forever and never ever coming back, for 2 weeks #VoteTory
I'll be spending most of my weekend vomiting on lovely pointy cocks as I deepthroat one ***got after another in a weekend of testosterone fuelled ****ery before spending Sunday with Julie and her family at the Chapel as I try to keep up this piss poor front that we are happy living the lie that I'm heterosexual. despise that cow
Since the Jocks have decided to go full kilt and haggis, what happens up there is no longer of any significance to the rest of the world.
I'll be smoking a couple of big fattys' , washed down with homemade Irish Cream at 8: 00 AM watching Swansea vs West Ham on cable in the morn . More of the same through the rest of the weekend except for a trip to the mountains Sunday morn .