The Queen had a ****e at 0818 am and the royal poo has now left Windsor Castle..Progress of its journey will be provided every 3 minutes on the national news..
No mate..According to eye witness accounts it was a soft one, and Phillip who was next in line to use the royal bog was heard cursing about her stinking and telling her to keep off the vindaloos in future..
best quote i heard was from the wife in Waitrose when a snobby old crow said something derogatory to the wife about working in a shop. She said, who do you think you are? your **** smells just like mine. Snobby cow didn't know what to say lol.
supposed to be an up market kind of supermarket, when the stuck up cnuts go shopping it makes my piss boil as they think they are above everyone and expect the staff to give them their undivided attention. Unfortunately that is what the staff do as that's what they have been trained up for, think i would just tell em to fack orff!!
What does the queen say when she needs to drop a log? One is going to the lavatory. I must go to the restroom. Me guts are knacking i need a ****e. Think ive followed through or that was a soggy fart.
The amount her chef gets paid, the food she eats, all the staff costs etc. I bet each of her turds are worth circa £5,000. There's another business idea. Anybody know where you can get decent head torches from?
Freezing it, now there's a good idea. Handy for all the squitty ones that she's dumped after chef made her a Madras.
Breakfast is a bowl of cereal, probably the variety pack, ricicles mixed with nesquick cereal. Space Raiders and a spam and egg butty for lunch. Dinner is a Weatherspoons mixed grill with brown sauce and a snickers for pudding.
