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Some Fun For a Friday Afternoon

Discussion in 'Watford' started by wear_yellow, Apr 8, 2011.

  1. Toby

    Toby GC's Life Coach

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    He cooks it?
     
    #801
  2. Toby

    Toby GC's Life Coach

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    5. The answer is that there's a grandfather a father and a son.
     
    #802
  3. Bolton's Boots

    Bolton's Boots Well-Known Member

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    Nope!
     
    #803
  4. Hornette_TID

    Hornette_TID Well-Known Member
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    i thought we already had that answer? lol
     
    #804
  5. Toby

    Toby GC's Life Coach

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    Oops sorry H I didn't notice <doh>
     
    #805
  6. Hornette_TID

    Hornette_TID Well-Known Member
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    lol no worries, it was fun watching you struggle ;)
     
    #806
  7. Leo

    Leo Well-Known Member

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    A mature (over 50) lady gets pulled over for speeding...

    Older Woman: Is there a problem, Officer?
    Officer: Ma'am, you were speeding.

    Older Woman: Oh, I see.

    Officer: Can I see your license please?

    Older Woman: I'd give it to you but I don't have one.

    Officer: Don't have one?

    Older Woman: Lost it, 4 years ago for drunk driving.

    Officer: I see...Can I see your vehicle registration papers please.

    Older Woman: I can't do that.

    Officer: Why not?

    Older Woman: I stole this car.

    Officer: Stole it?

    Older Woman: Yes, and I killed and hacked up the owner.

    Officer: You what?

    Older Woman: His body parts are in plastic bags in the trunk if you want to see

    The Officer looks at the woman and slowly backs away to his car and calls for back up. Within minutes 5 police cars circle the car. A senior officer slowly approaches the car, clasping his half drawn gun.

    Officer 2: Ma'am, could you step out of your vehicle please! The woman steps out of her vehicle.

    Older woman: Is there a problem sir?

    Officer 2: One of my officers told me that you have stolen this car and murdered the owner.

    Older Woman: Murdered the owner?

    Officer 2: Yes, could you please open the trunk of your car, please.

    The woman opens the trunk, revealing nothing but an empty trunk.

    Officer 2: Is this your car, ma'am?

    Older Woman: Yes, here are the registration papers.
    The officer is quite stunned.

    Officer 2: One of my officers claims that you do not have a driving license.

    The woman digs into her handbag and pulls out a clutch purse and hands it to the officer.

    The officer examines the license. He looks quite puzzled.

    Officer 2: Thank you ma'am, one of my officers told me you didn't have a license, that you stole this car, and that you murdered and hacked up the owner.

    Older Woman: Bet the liar told you I was speeding, too.

    LESSON : Don't Mess With Mature Ladies
     
    #807
  8. HaslemereKev

    HaslemereKev Well-Known Member

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    haha brilliant <applause>
     
    #808
  9. Norwayhornet

    Norwayhornet Well-Known Member

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    Must tell mrs N that one could save me a fortune;)
     
    #809
  10. Leo

    Leo Well-Known Member

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    Thought better than to dedicate that to someone we all know :)
     
    #810

  11. Hornette_TID

    Hornette_TID Well-Known Member
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    tee hee ;) quite right too!
     
    #811
  12. Hornette_TID

    Hornette_TID Well-Known Member
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    BB - is that other #4 ..that she's a midwife? Did we answer that question? lol
     
    #812
  13. Bolton's Boots

    Bolton's Boots Well-Known Member

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    Pay attention H - we did answer that one - they weren't twins because they were two of triplets! Bet you were a teacher's nightmare :biggrin:


    You still haven't answered this one:

    2. A businessman buys rice for 50p per pound from growers in Indonesia, then sells it on it India for only 10p per pound. He still manages to become a millionaire &#8211; how?
     
    #813
  14. Norwayhornet

    Norwayhornet Well-Known Member

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    Because he sold a load more to Norway at £10 per pound!
     
    #814
  15. Bolton's Boots

    Bolton's Boots Well-Known Member

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    Hmm - I take it that even rice is expensive in the land of Noggin the Nog :)

    But, no...........
     
    #815
  16. Norwayhornet

    Norwayhornet Well-Known Member

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    Shucks! back to the drawing board ;)
     
    #816
  17. Hornette_TID

    Hornette_TID Well-Known Member
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    <laugh> i must have missed that...i searched high and low for the answer last night! lol

    I thought we answered that one! It was something to do with there being 50 million rupees to the pound..or was that wrong? lol
     
    #817
  18. Bolton's Boots

    Bolton's Boots Well-Known Member

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    Yes, that was wrong. When do you want me to put you out of your misery? :)
     
    #818
  19. NZHorn

    NZHorn Well-Known Member

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    He started off as a billionaire?
     
    #819
  20. Bolton's Boots

    Bolton's Boots Well-Known Member

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    <applause>

    Hi NZ - how's the Land of the Long White Cloud?

    Can I ask before Norway does - have you heard we have a left back? :biggrin:
     
    #820

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