Firstly thanks for the various suggestions for the forthcoming stag in Nooooooooooocastle. Have been today to pick up the Arab outfit that we are all obliged to wear..... It`s black and white - I am sooooooooooooo sorry - but am in 2 minds , do I wear it and pay for it in the after life or do I lose the £50 deposit and paint the white part with reed stripes.....will I be allowed back on if I wear black and white Such a dilema - please help!!!
This is a serious issue and one that you will have to resolve with your own conscience. Personaly I would gladly pay any amount not to wear black and white...
my advice is wear it but piss all over it before returning, if its a good stag do it should be easy to do
I would say that it doesn't fit you very well and get your money back. Actually wearing it is surely not an option!
There have been a couple of suggestions from work - the one I like most (albeit a risk I get sent down for a long stretch) is to chop the head of a mag and use the arterial spurts of blood to paint intricate stripes on the white shirty thing - 2 birds one stone..... Maybe a little excessive?
Really - that`s the best we can get - I was going to paint a pair of lips on the back and go as Laurance of a labia
In such sartorial diallemas the only true course of action is to wear a full-body hair shirt beneath the offending vestments. Alternatively, you could call off the marriage, therefore negating the need to wear black and white. x
Alternatively, you could call off the marriage, therefore negating the need to wear black and white. x[/QUOTE] Not a bad idea but she`s a bit of a piece and he would never find anything better (and he is **** scared of her already!)
OK. As a compromise, make sure you wear your football shirt under your wedding suit on the big day. Deal? x
You could make out that you're there to buy the local ****-heap, sorry, football club - that'll get the locals excited.
You've got 3 options. 1. Get it and do as Syd suggests which lets face it, pretty much nailed on that you will either puke all over it or piss yourself. 2. Get it and wear you new Sunderland shirt over the top of it. (my personal favourite) 3. Tell your mates it didn't fit.
