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Off Topic Just for Mr RAWhite

Discussion in 'Sunderland' started by Smug in Boots, Jan 19, 2015.

  1. Sunderpitt

    Sunderpitt Well-Known Member

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    An army sergeant walks into a whorehouse and approaches the madam and says, "My name is Sgt Major Dick and I'm here for a woman!" The madam immediately escorts the soldier upstairs and selects the best call girl they have for him.
    Sgt Major Dick immediately disrobes and is standing with his hands on his hips while he looks at the prostitute waiting for him on the bed. He says, "My name is Sgt Dick, been in the army thirty years, and I'm a master of my mind and body, DICK, ATTEN-SHUN. Immediately his penis becomes instantly erect!
    The prostitute is in awe and asks how he can do it. The Sgt Major replies, "Like I said, I've been in the army thirty years and I have total control over my mind and body, DICK, AT EASE." His penis immediately goes limp.
    The prostitute still can't get over what she saw and asks him to make it hard then soft then hard again.
    She asks him again how he does it. The Sgt Major shouts, "I have already told you honey, I have been in the army thirty years, and I am master of my mind and body, DICK, ATTEN-SHUN. His penis goes instantly hard. Then he gives the following command, "DICK- AT EASE!" The Sgt Major looks down and is amazed to see his penis is fully erect. The Sgt Major is now fuming, and says, "I'm going to tell you one more time, DICK-AT EASE!" No luck. His penis is still hard. He yells "God Dammit!" and moves to the side of the bed and starts to masturbate vigorously.
    The prostitute asks, "What the hell is going on?"
    The Sgt Major replies, "This soldier disobeyed a direct order, and I'm giving him a dishonourable discharge!"
     
    #3241
    Smug in Boots and MrRAWhite like this.
  2. MrRAWhite

    MrRAWhite Well-Known Member

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    Looks like you pulled that one off Sunders..<ok>
     
    #3242
  3. Mick Buxton's Allotment

    Mick Buxton's Allotment Well-Known Member

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    I think it's a toss up
     
    #3243
  4. Smug in Boots

    Smug in Boots Well-Known Member

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    There's no vas deferens either way to be honest <ok>
     
    #3244
  5. Mick Buxton's Allotment

    Mick Buxton's Allotment Well-Known Member

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    See men, this thread keeps on going
     
    #3245
  6. rooch 3

    rooch 3 Well-Known Member

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    Just like Dick.
     
    #3246
  7. MrRAWhite

    MrRAWhite Well-Known Member

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    Who has pulled Dick I want to know..<grr>
     
    #3247
  8. Mick Buxton's Allotment

    Mick Buxton's Allotment Well-Known Member

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    At least we no longer have the willy or won't he scenario
     
    #3248
    Smug in Boots likes this.
  9. Smug in Boots

    Smug in Boots Well-Known Member

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    It's semen that way ......
     
    #3249
  10. Mick Buxton's Allotment

    Mick Buxton's Allotment Well-Known Member

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    But it took real spunk to make the decision, though
     
    #3250

  11. MrRAWhite

    MrRAWhite Well-Known Member

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    He was very cock sure of himself..
     
    #3251
  12. Gordon Armstrong

    Gordon Armstrong Just another S.A.F.C. fan
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  13. MrRAWhite

    MrRAWhite Well-Known Member

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    Enough of your blinkered remarks..
     
    #3253
  14. grandpops

    grandpops Well-Known Member

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    No need for a long face though.
     
    #3254
  15. MrRAWhite

    MrRAWhite Well-Known Member

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    Watch thee fetlocks lad..
     
    #3255
  16. grandpops

    grandpops Well-Known Member

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    Can`t gallop about like I used to mate. :emoticon-0106-cryin
     
    #3256
  17. MrRAWhite

    MrRAWhite Well-Known Member

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    I, but ya still a canter-ankerous owld bugger though..
     
    #3257
  18. grandpops

    grandpops Well-Known Member

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    Saddled with it now mate.
     
    #3258
  19. MrRAWhite

    MrRAWhite Well-Known Member

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    At least you have still got your own hair and don't wear a stirrup of fig..
     
    #3259
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  20. grandpops

    grandpops Well-Known Member

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    I nearly bit there.
     
    #3260

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