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Ian Beale's Premature Ejaculation Hell

Discussion in 'General Chat' started by User Deleted, Jul 11, 2011.

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  1. Otto Flayshow

    Otto Flayshow Well-Known Member

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    Try hitting the pause button when you feel you're approaching the point of no return. <ok>
     
    #21
    Otto Flayshow, Jul 11, 2011
  2. Jobby Funbags

    Jobby Funbags Guest

    The traditional method, as far as I was aware, was always to think of your granny having a ****e as soon as you approach the tickly bit <ok>
     
    #22
    Jobby Funbags, Jul 11, 2011
  3. Otto Flayshow

    Otto Flayshow Well-Known Member

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    You could apply for a job here:

    please log in to view this image
     
    #23
    Otto Flayshow, Jul 11, 2011
  4. The Raging Oxter

    The Raging Oxter Well-Known Member

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    Hmmm kinky...
     
    #24
    The Raging Oxter, Jul 11, 2011
  5. Jip Jaap Stam

    Jip Jaap Stam General Chat Moderator Staff Member

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    Just go down on her for a while first. If you can sort her out that way, you can be more relaxed with your own performance. Try doing sums in your head while your pounding, or try to remember football scores. Failing all that, just get pissed <ok>
     
    #25
    Jip Jaap Stam, Jul 11, 2011
  6. User Deleted

    User Deleted Well-Known Member

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    thats the problem i wouldnt even qualify for a job there right now man
     
    #26
    User Deleted, Jul 11, 2011

  7. Jobby Funbags

    Jobby Funbags Guest

    or....


    "Granny having a ****e, granny having a ****e, granny having a ****e"

    <ok>
     
    #27
    Jobby Funbags, Jul 11, 2011
  8. Otto Flayshow

    Otto Flayshow Well-Known Member

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    Or Susan Boyle removing Ann Widdecombe's used tampon with her teeth.
     
    #28
    Otto Flayshow, Jul 11, 2011
  9. The Raging Oxter

    The Raging Oxter Well-Known Member

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    Anyone else turned on by these suggestions?
     
    #29
    The Raging Oxter, Jul 11, 2011
  10. Denny Kalglish

    Denny Kalglish Member

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    You need to take a leaf from Sting's book lad y'know? Try that fantantric sex?

    "Free free set them free..."

    "A doo doo doo a daa daa daa"

    You get me?
     
    #30
    Denny Kalglish, Jul 11, 2011
  11. Jobby Funbags

    Jobby Funbags Guest

    I think I'm more turned on by the thought of Beale's dribbling floppy, TBH
     
    #31
    Jobby Funbags, Jul 11, 2011
  12. Otto Flayshow

    Otto Flayshow Well-Known Member

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    Have a quick **** an hour beforehand. You'll be able to last longer second time round. <ok>
     
    #32
    Otto Flayshow, Jul 11, 2011
  13. User Deleted

    User Deleted Well-Known Member

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    know what i dont get? how come when im crouched over the toilet chuggin to a picture of, i dunno, say miley cyrus i can last a good 4 minutes yet when i go to pump a fatty from a club i blow my load in seconds? then need to come out with the 'aw its cos your so sexy, thats never happened before' pish
     
    #33
    User Deleted, Jul 11, 2011
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