I've had more than my fair share...The first one I remember is when I was just a young kid playing with a bamboo stick in the garden and as I was running with it the stick hit a wall and the other end went down my throat. The blood was everywhere and the doctor in the hospital told my mother that I was very lucky to survive it.
My Granda saved my life when I was 9, a grape got lodged in my throat and I couldn't breathe or anything. Vaguely remember going dizzy and weak then finally with the heinrich maneuver it come flying out and nearly smashed through the bloody window. 10 years later we were in his back garden and he took a sudden heart attack, it was my time to save his life, I tried everything but nothing worked. It still rips me apart now that I failed and couldn't return the favour, I feel so guilty He was the greatest dad/granda/man that has ever lived.
Choked on a coin aged two and stopped breathing and eventually my heart stopped, woke up in hospital, had a very vivid 'bright light' moment that's all I can remember, probably a ceiling light. Also got hit by a car aged 10 on Halloween the bloke was wired and pissed and he just fled, left me for dead, luckily it was Halloween so wasn't long before somebody found me. Also shagged a very overweight girl and she went on top, temporarily, which was the worst of all 3 by far.
I n early choked on a spangle when I was a kid. More recently I had a brain hemorrhage wile having an epileptic seizure which resulted in an eight day stay in the RVI. I was out for hours & didn't realize how lucky I was until I'd spoke to the head injury consultant.
Diabetic Keto-acidosis nearly killed me 4 times in my younger days before they invented insulin pumps!! Once I was violently out of it (my then girlfriend told me afterwards) and punching and kicking everyone in view - had no idea and still can't remember but I "died" twice that night (heart stopped) and they brought me back! Two non diabetic related ones - Playing on my sons scooter about 4 years ago thought "this is easy - bet I can bunny hop" I did - and went over the handlebars and landed on my head - swelling on the brain and induced coma for 2 days but was out within a week and fine within a few weeks - the other one was a bad car crash where I hit someone head on on the A167 near the red lion coming out of Durham (Kimblesworth turn off for anyone who knows it) - was out for 14 hours and still have no idea but had an out of body experience and saw the whole accident from around 15 foot in the air to the middle of the dual carriage-way - vivid, terrifying memory!
A school friend during my early teens had his dads 250cc motorbike - he said I could try out as I'd never rode a bike before -so I went hurtling off, pretty fast, no helmet. no lights, in the dark across a playing field that had unknown to me been fenced and wired off in the middle of the park (around the newly layered cricket wicket pitch irc) needless to say I hit the taught wire, fortunately across my chest and not my neck! - even so I was catapulted backwards a fair distance as the bike carried forwards for a short while before crashing into a fence pole-must have looked funny if anyone would have seen it, I suffered pretty bad whiplash, cuts and bruising - and a right old earful of my school mates dad for busting up his motorbike.
Wish there was a empathy button as like feels wrong. That's horrible fella. Hope you can shrug off the guilt, not everybody is savable fella and nowt will stop a good grandfatha playing with his grandkids. If he were here now he'd tell you these things happen and that he left this world with one last great experience. Spending time with his grandson. People leave this world alone and crippled with regret. He'd count himself lucky he went with the people he loved around him. He'd know his life served purpose and wouldn't want you blaming yourself. You're good man, you don't deserve this guilt.
