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Off Topic A better man ......

Discussion in 'Sunderland' started by Smug in Boots, Feb 18, 2015.

  1. Smug in Boots

    Smug in Boots Well-Known Member

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    ........ which I'm sure we'd all really like to be to our family, friends & neighbours.

    I spend a lot of time, these days, examining how I am with people.

    Do I give enough to my charity the Sally Army, do I keep an eye out for my elderly neighbours and happily clear their steps of snow without making them feel inadequate, do I talk to the Big Issue fella like a normal bloke and just have a daft laugh with him as equals?

    Does it matter ........ If it doesn't then life is just a selfish waste of time in my opinion.

    I try every day to be my brother's keeper but it's hard isn't it?
    But, surely that shouldn't stop us trying .......... otherwise it's just a little cowardly and diminishes us all.

    I hope this song helps explain a little .......... we're all in this together and a little effort, on our part, can make a big difference to others.
    And surely that inevitably makes a big difference to us. I truly hope so.

     
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    Last edited: Feb 18, 2015
  2. MrRAWhite

    MrRAWhite Well-Known Member

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    Nice one mate..It always makes me feel better if I think I have done someone a good deed, so I understand where you are coming from..
     
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  3. Smug in Boots

    Smug in Boots Well-Known Member

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    That surely makes you a better man and why people, like me, respect you.

    Respect, from other people, is surely worth more than that good deed cost you <ok>
     
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  4. C19RK73

    C19RK73 Red & White army!

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    Karma can be a bitch thats why i like to pay it forward
     
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  5. MrRAWhite

    MrRAWhite Well-Known Member

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    Exactly...I always try to be loyal to my friends and to know that you have their respect means a lot..
     
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  6. Deleted #

    Deleted # Well-Known Member

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    Great thread. I'll give it a go with my honesty.

    I was caught up in the wrong lifestyle and had been for many a year, in the last 2-3 years, I was in serious bother with the Police twice. Lucky to avoid long sentences on each occasion. Some people on here know, some people don't. I don't talk about my past any more, I learned it never allowed me to move on by doing so. I was a write off in everybodys eyes apart from one person who refused to give up on me.

    It was at that time, I called it make or break. I chose to make it and began by slowly ditching the circle I was in one by one, considering I'd been friends for over 20 years with some of these lads you can't imagine how tough it was and still now I miss them. I also moved home away from the door that had its fair share of trouble brought to it, I moved to an area where I could keep my head down and a low profile, surrounded myself with an amazing friend who's been law abiding all his life and I've had to more or less re-program my character and behaviours to how normal people live.

    I'm proud to say I've come full circle now, I have started a business which is on the rise and have recently been working in partnership with the company that was involved in the design of the new central station in Newcastle with more work to follow, things are very, very promising for my company. I've also got a charity which I support now, I put it on a thread the other day. It's a charity which keeps kids with low self-esteem and confidence off the streets and in to an enviroment where they can socialise and learn new things, it's so pleasing to know I'm making a difference and to actually see the development in these kids. This is my way of giving something back for the way I've been in the past. Still call in and see my Nana twice a week, she lives in a row of 4. The guy on the end has always done everything for my nana since Granda died and unfortunately he's just been diagnosed with cancer, so now when my Nana needs things from the shop I give his door a knock and it's my turn to return the favour now.

    I feel I'm doing my bit for society now, but not as a 'good deed' but because I owe it to society to give something back.
     
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  7. MrRAWhite

    MrRAWhite Well-Known Member

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    Nice post Safc83...I really hope that everything works out for you..It looks like you have put a hell of a lot of effort in and I hope you have long term rewards because of it..<applause>
     
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  8. Brian Storm

    Brian Storm Well-Known Member

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    The old lady next door was getting extorted by a neighbor charging a fortune to do her garden. I sent him packing and now Me and my lady(when up for it) now do her garden for free. Still doing food banks as well as donating pet food and I have a coffee and chat on the front with old fella who helps the lady next door(he tipped me off about the extortion), he loves the chats and the coffee. Feel obligated. Done some nasty **** in the past and trying to balance scales a bit. Keep up the good deeds fellas. Good work. Respect.
     
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  9. Deleted #

    Deleted # Well-Known Member

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    Thanks RAW, it hasn't been easy and there has been some incredibly dark days along the way. I've stuck with it though and now I'm starting to reap the rewards. Thriving business, nice holidays and most importantly, I'm happy and fulfilled!

    Thanks again, nice words from a poster I've always held in the utmost respect <ok>
     
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  10. Home_and_Away

    Home_and_Away Well-Known Member

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    Impressive marra.... Keep up the good work <applause>
     
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  11. its been fun thanks :)

    its been fun thanks :) ♬♬Badum-tish! ♬♬ Forum Moderator

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    I feel as I'm getting older- on the one hand that I certainly hold more of a negative stance, I'm far more cynical regarding our 'everyday life' the external - society that's made up of bullshit propaganda of politics, religion, culture, media, consumerism etc I've no trust or faith in any of these ideologies - I used to believe but now I find I question almost everything - though on the other hand- I'm far more compassionate than ever to my immediate surroundings my family , friends and neighbours to my love of art and music - its a conundrum to be honest to strive to be the better person but being held back by the 'big society' we dwell in.
     
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  12. Smug in Boots

    Smug in Boots Well-Known Member

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    As usual you hit the nail right on the heed <ok>

    The more I retreat from society the 'better man' I am with my fellow human beings.

    I give without being patronising, accept with genuine humility and give people the benefit of doubt.

    I never used to give anyone the benefit of doubt, once I'd made my judgement that was basically it.
     
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  13. MrRAWhite

    MrRAWhite Well-Known Member

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    I try to separate the macro issues related to national and global issues beyond my control from the micro issues related to my friends, family and associates that I can have some influence on.
    However, I do get involved in many political issues and campaigns mainly through an organisation called 38 Degrees which enables ordinary people to join together to influence government on a variety of issues.
     
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  14. Deleted #

    Deleted # Well-Known Member

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    I forgot to mention, also a great choice of song Smug. The song means a great deal to me but the Robbie Williams one.
     
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  15. Q

    Q Well-Known Member

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    There's an old saying 'pay it forward'.
    I'm a believer in positive karma.
     
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  16. Nostalgic

    Nostalgic Well-Known Member

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    I am no religious nut or a great believer in it but surely the saying "do unto others" was missing from your lives. My generation was brought up by parents who were raised by the last of the Victorian era. It can also be claimed that Society was hi-jacked by those free thinkers in the '60s who wanted a loosening of the rules that were seen as archaic and out of touch with modern society.

    Please you have all found a decent way to live happily but it was there all the time if you wanted to embrace it.
     
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  17. Blunham Mackem

    Blunham Mackem Well-Known Member Forum Moderator

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    Great post Safc. An inspirational story for any young lad who's lost some sense of direction in their life.

    To know that one's future isn't set in stone from mistakes made early on in life, that a life can be turned around by understanding the true meaning of self-respect.
     
    #17
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  18. The Outlaw

    The Outlaw Well-Known Member

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    Cheers, brother.
     
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  19. password invalid

    password invalid Well-Known Member

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    Great sentiments ,as far as i am concerned its just being normal,attitude is a lot to do with experience in life ,some gain qualities earlier than others however its never too late to alter ones ways and many do as they get older.
     
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  20. Big Bad Wesley Brown

    Big Bad Wesley Brown Well-Known Member

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    I definitely believe in karma like. The universe has a funny way of working things out. I remember once I was in a queue for a cash machine back in my first year at uni. The lad in front of me looked proper stressed out, and he took his credit card but left £40 in cash at the machine. I grabbed it and ran after him to give it back to him, never seen anyone look so grateful before, he even offered me £20 as payment. I just told him that forgetting the money was the sort of daft thing I'd do one day, and I'd want someone to do the same thing for me.

    Two years later I was at Sheffield train station and needed some cash for the journey, but only had about 5 minutes left until the train departed. I left £30 at the machine, and this lass gave me a shout as I was leaving to tell me I'd forgotten it.

    Two very small things in the grand scheme of things, but I'm a big believer that what goes around comes around!
     
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