Wtf are you talking about? I go out, I do things, I ask girls out if I'm attracted to them.... how the **** is that not having a pair? Wtf is your criteria for having a pair?
Being happily married . Having several lovely children , millions in the bank . Hence I only have 1.5.........
So you're telling me to grow a pair despite the fact that you don't have a pair yourself by your own definition? ....k
Because you've already managed to find another person to obsess about and ultimately make a cock up with because of that. Perhaps you need to learn to be comfortable in your own skin, rather than obsessing about finding a girl to complete/fix you. So yes. Stay in.
Firstly, I'm not obsessing over anyone. Secondly, I didn't cock anything up, she just said she wasn't interested. Thirdly, I would have probably gone out anyway regardless of the date. Fourthly, my desire to find a girl is actually explained to quite a large extent by some kind of deep psychological um.... stuff, which I'd rather not go into on this forum.
PL Here's a gift to you in the form of some truth. You can take it or leave it, I honestly don't care, but it is the truth. There is not a girl in the world right now that is going to go anywhere near you, apart from one with an even more dismal level of self-esteem than you have. Therefore any relationship you enter right now will be a horrific, grasping tangle of co-dependence, which will utterly consume you (you'll mistake it for love) and ultimately will **** you up and hurt you in ways you can't even conceive of right now. So seriously, stop worrying about being in any kind of relationship right now and concentrate on doing some work on yourself first (how old are you btw?). The only person that can really fix you or 'make you whole' is you. Then you'll be ready for a grown up, adult, healthy relationship. Right now you're a million miles away from that. There you are. Take it or leave it.
I actually haven't at all, and I do really feel for him. But sometimes people just need to listen to sense! First off, get that book FLT was talking about. Positive action to help himself - it would go a long way.
Poor old PL. He just wants to share his problems. Not everyone has the confidence to just chat up girls like some of you appear to have. Give him a break. If you are fed up with hearing his woes why don't you just ignore him instead of laying into him or taking the piss? This is not aimed at any constructive responses he has received.
I've written before to PL that he needs to stop portraying himself as a victim. If he is really that unhappy with his intimate social life then he needs to change the scenario. Yes, books about positive thinking and action are all well and good, but the change has to come from within. What he lacks is confidence, in a major way. all these little thoughts and worries would disappear if he had some. the trouble is, when you're at the bottom of the confidence pile it's difficult to see what a big dose of it will do, and how to get it seems even harder. The people giving advice have all been there. Time and again, we've informed him how he can change the scenario and he doesn't act upon it. Only he can make the change. End of story.
