http://www.belfasttelegraph.co.uk/n...uns-gauntlet-of-wartorn-belfast-30657795.html Tagline: That's Russ Provan for you!
Armed with just a few jokes and amusing anecdotes, and a natural penchant for punnery, he managed to keep an IRA hit squad at bay for 24 hours before he was air-lifted back to base.
There don't appear to be any scenes of a sexual nature therefore this straw chewing cider swilling **** will probably not bother.
Russ rapes loads of taig burds in a revenge mission in a follow up film called 72 (tattie howking whores)
Russ, after getting cornered, is approached by 3 high ranking IRA men. "What's your reason for being here, Jock" says the jug eared, moustachioed Fenian. Russ quips "ear you, moustache you a question!" The IRA guys buckle with laughter as Russ saunters off to finally hunt down and kill Ciaran's father/brother.
In another sticky situation, Russ is being held hostage by the Provos. "What do you call an IRA sniper?" he asks his captors. "We don't know," they reply. "Rick O'Shea," he answers. As they hold their sides and slap their thighs, Russ makes good his escape. Another time he's trapped down an alley on the Falls Road. "Did you hear about the Irish golfer who thought a provisional ball was an IRA dance?" he cracks. As they're whooping with laughter, Russ is over the wall and away like a scalded cat.
IRA, pffft ****erly wee cowards one and all. If they canny sneak up on ye with a bomb or a gun to the back of the heid when yer no lookin they jessies won't come near ye at all. The pricks got chased oot most of North Lanarkshire 25-30 years ago. Granted, they all ended up 3 miles away in Coatbridge. Their wimmin are an easy ride and I ain't been honey trapped yet. I just shag their durty easy wimmin and laff at their durty cowardly men. I hate IRA supporters more than I hate "no" voters
Gambol gets tanked up on Merlot, wanders round 'Freedom Square ' and heckles innocent passers-by about what might have been. It's no way to spend an autumnal Monday evening.