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HELP!! Dating Advice Needed!

Discussion in 'General Chat' started by Lightfoot, Jun 28, 2011.

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  1. Lightfoot

    Lightfoot Member

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    Looking for a bit of advice here guys.

    I've got a hot date on Friday. My Nat King is 100% copper-bottom guaranteed. <ok>

    Thing is, we’re going out for a meal to a posh restaurant first. As well as costing me a packet <grr>, there will be implications later.

    My problem is I don’t perform well on a full stomach <doh>

    But I don’t want to eat too much incase I barf all over the bint whilst doing the Fandango when we get back to the **** Bunker.

    So I’m stuck with ordering Gressingham duck with all the trimmings at £24 a pop, and only picking at it …..

    So what do I do? Give the starter and dessert a miss? – and risk looking like a right tight cant?

    Or….. Fill my boots, but slip off to the lavvie and stick my finger down my throat before we get jiggy?

    Any help and advice gratefully received!

    Thanks in advance <ok>
     
    #1
    Lightfoot, Jun 28, 2011
  2. Fabulous Fabio

    Fabulous Fabio Well-Known Member

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    **** bunker <laugh>

    Thats actually the only bit of this story that i believe
     
    #2
    Fabulous Fabio, Jun 28, 2011
  3. badblood

    badblood Member

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    MONEY SAVING ADVICE

    Use rohypnol and save
     
    #3
    badblood, Jun 28, 2011
  4. The Raging Oxter

    The Raging Oxter Well-Known Member

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    Lightfoot

    I've got to ask:

    Are you still a virgin?
     
    #4
    The Raging Oxter, Jun 28, 2011
  5. Fabulous Fabio

    Fabulous Fabio Well-Known Member

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    Anyone who calls it their **** bunker surely must be
     
    #5
    Fabulous Fabio, Jun 28, 2011
  6. badblood

    badblood Member

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    It must be an awful life for a "man" who cannot eat to much before getting lucky.
    Man up ***git if i was you i would sneak a burger in on way home!
     
    #6
    badblood, Jun 28, 2011

  7. Lightfoot

    Lightfoot Member

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    WTF! I just dont wanna barf all over the bitch! Is that too 'Modern man' for you?! FFS! <doh>
     
    #7
    Lightfoot, Jun 28, 2011
  8. The Raging Oxter

    The Raging Oxter Well-Known Member

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    Seriously though, are you a virgin?
     
    #8
    The Raging Oxter, Jun 28, 2011
  9. HackerJack

    HackerJack Member

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    If it's a proper posh resteraunt you won't have to worry about being full because you will be served a guinea pigs testicle accompanied by two peas a dribble of moose spit.
     
    #9
    HackerJack, Jun 28, 2011
  10. Lightfoot

    Lightfoot Member

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    No. Are You?

    ST, if I told you about the flange I'm getting justnow, you wouldn't believe it mate <whistle>
     
    #10
    Lightfoot, Jun 28, 2011
  11. The Raging Oxter

    The Raging Oxter Well-Known Member

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    <laugh>

    Definite virgin.
     
    #11
    The Raging Oxter, Jun 28, 2011
  12. Heavy Metal Toon

    Heavy Metal Toon Guest

    At least he's not a childish **** like you.
     
    #12
    Heavy Metal Toon, Jun 28, 2011
  13. THe Mighty Huth Rocks

    THe Mighty Huth Rocks New Member

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    flange? are you a trainee carpenter?????
     
    #13
    THe Mighty Huth Rocks, Jun 28, 2011
  14. Lightfoot

    Lightfoot Member

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    what he said <ok>
     
    #14
    Lightfoot, Jun 28, 2011
  15. Girvan Loyal 1690

    Girvan Loyal 1690 Nobody's safe now

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    some dilemma that.
     
    #15
    Girvan Loyal 1690, Jun 28, 2011
  16. The Raging Oxter

    The Raging Oxter Well-Known Member

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    What's ****?
     
    #16
    The Raging Oxter, Jun 28, 2011
  17. Girvan Loyal 1690

    Girvan Loyal 1690 Nobody's safe now

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    no geordies allowed on general chat. ****in silly accented bastards
     
    #17
    Girvan Loyal 1690, Jun 28, 2011
  18. HackerJack

    HackerJack Member

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    You're right.
     
    #18
    HackerJack, Jun 28, 2011
  19. Heavy Metal Toon

    Heavy Metal Toon Guest

    Isn't it funny how all Glaswegians on this website are dick heads?
     
    #19
    Heavy Metal Toon, Jun 28, 2011
  20. The Raging Oxter

    The Raging Oxter Well-Known Member

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    Anyone who comes onto not606 boasting about shagging loads of fanny is a virgin. It's called the Hoadie-Boy principle <ok>
     
    #20
    The Raging Oxter, Jun 28, 2011
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