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Farts

Discussion in 'General Chat' started by erasmus, Jan 8, 2011.

  1. erasmus

    erasmus New Member

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    There seems to be some right boring farts on here.

    Some think they are the Daddy !!!!

    Is Venom PD The Daddy ??? He sounds like a ****er !!

    Is Neville a criminal ??? He sounds like one ??

    Is Bollo bollo sexually frustrated ? Perhaps Dougie should suck him off !!

    Guys !!:kiss::kiss: This place needs life !!:sad::sad::sad::sad::sad:
     
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  2. VenomPD

    VenomPD Merrick jr

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    Maybe you should go **** yourself with a rusty spoon.



    Welcome to Not606 bawsack (Or **** off) ) (Or possibly even hello Pope)
     
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  3. BolloBollo

    BolloBollo Active Member

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    Oh I like you way of thinking on that one!!

    please log in to view this image
     
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  4. The Raging Oxter

    The Raging Oxter Well-Known Member

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    I'm a daddy <wizard>, a criminal :bandit: and sexually frustrated :headbang:

    You got a ****ing problem with that arse fiddler? <grr>
     
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  5. VenomPD

    VenomPD Merrick jr

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    <laugh>

    Daddy Sexually Frustrated Criminal - Is that not a Boney M song?
     
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  6. BolloBollo

    BolloBollo Active Member

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    <laugh> I thought it was Earth, Wind, Fire and Theft?
     
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  7. Tina_old

    Tina_old Princess

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    That will be going through my mind when I renew my car insurance next month.

    Thanks for that.

    <laugh>
     
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  8. EDGE

    EDGE Guest

    Just went to go for my morning ****e, only to discover that we've ran out of bogroll <grr>

    ****in' ragin'
     
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  9. VenomPD

    VenomPD Merrick jr

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    <laugh> Hope you didn't do the ****e first EDGE that would be a rookie mistake.

    Someone had the ****s on here yesterday and was caught short getting into the toilet. They shat all over the sauna floor and their own trainers. It's a mystery who it was. At first they thought someone had done another "dirty protest" after the **** smeared all over the cubicle last year. But now they reckon he was just too late getting from the gym to the toilet and shat on the sauna floor en route <laugh> <laugh>
     
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  10. do you have gyms and saunas on these rigs?
     
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  11. EDGE

    EDGE Guest

    Venom,

    Never made the rookie mistake, sent the boy over to Tesco to buy bogroll, he was taking too long, so I had to go and wait for him to come back, the ****e had started to crust over my anus by the time the bogroll arrived back.
     
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  12. Kim Jong Il

    Kim Jong Il Well-Known Member

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    its that fanny SSK, who is probably also pope.
     
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  13. VenomPD

    VenomPD Merrick jr

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    <laugh> It's an oil rig not a prison. We've got a pool/snooker room, a ping-pong room (**** knows why) three TV rooms. Two of them have 52 inch Sony 3D TV's and with blu-ray players and surround sound. Plus the gym and a sauna. They just bought two £25K fireplaces for the smokers and non-smokers TV rooms too (again **** knows why)

    There is also an internet room with 8 computers for folk to use.

    Plus they're in the process of putting Sky HD into each bunk so that everyone can record their own programmes. They actually look after us not too bad on here, and the grub is decent enough as well.

    They need to keep the boys happy because if you've got a pissed off load of humpty ****s stuck on a metal ****-hole for 2-3 weeks then things can get nasty and production goes down. Some platforms can produce 80-100 thousand barrels of oil a day and the same in litres of natural gas too. So they can make tens of millions in profit every single day.
     
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  14. **** sake! sign me up
     
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  15. VenomPD

    VenomPD Merrick jr

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    <laugh> <laugh>

    In a lot of ways it's the cushiest job going. Some of the mechies/sparkies/instrument guys on here only work 16-18 weeks a year. Get the rest of the year off (apart from a few training courses and the like) and get paid £40-60K

    I work about 20-24 weeks a year on average. But I don't do any office work at all really. very occasionally I'll have to go in to finish up a report or something.

    It can be ****ing soul-destroying when you're stuck out here and you're hearing about folk heading out for nights-out or going to gigs or whatever though. Plus it's a total **** having a bird if you work offshore and are the jealous type.

    Being single and having no mortgage, debts or financial obligations and working offshore like I do is actually a magic life though. Plenty of spare cash and loads of time off. I've just ended-up spending the last two years with Mon-Fri sitting about playing Xbox, smoking grass then spending the weekend on the shot buying ching.
     
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  16. The Raging Oxter

    The Raging Oxter Well-Known Member

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    Aye, I can imagine

    please log in to view this image
     
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  17. VenomPD

    VenomPD Merrick jr

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    <laugh> <laugh>

    Did you have that picture saved on your computer? A joke's a joke but that's quite a specific picture ya queer hawk
     
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  18. Kim Jong Il

    Kim Jong Il Well-Known Member

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    <laugh> looks like you touched a nerve there stereo.
     
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  19. The Raging Oxter

    The Raging Oxter Well-Known Member

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    Do you like my shoulder tattoo? I got it when I was in the SS! ;)

    <laugh>
     
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