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London Transport

Discussion in 'General Chat' started by jonathan acworth 1971, Jun 13, 2014.

  1. jonathan acworth 1971

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    what needs improving

    1,air conditioning in summer
    2.more regualar service
    3.prices
    4.new high speed rail link
    5.cheaper boat services

    what would u do to improve london transport lets pass on to our hopeless mayor!
     
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  2. The Raging Oxter

    The Raging Oxter Well-Known Member

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    You should strap on a bomb, get on the tube during rush hour and blow it up.
     
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  3. gas

    gas ACCOUNT DELETED
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    ^^^^^

    Or a bus
     
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  4. Shawswood

    Shawswood Well-Known Member

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    A Mumbai influenced makeover needs to be introduced, featuring 1st class carriages and roof and external accommodation for those who can't conduct themselves properly inside; and a babe carriage too.
     
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  5. stopmeandslapme

    stopmeandslapme Well-Known Member

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    From where to where?

    It can get a bit hot on the Underground but in this weather it must be the best place to be, all those escalators combined with skimpy clothing.
     
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  6. RAVENBLACK

    RAVENBLACK Well-Known Member

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    As XTC said "The Mayor Of Simpleton".

    You get what you deserve.
     
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  7. Otto Flayshow

    Otto Flayshow Well-Known Member

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    1. jetpacks
    2. hover boards
    3. rickshaws
    4. dedicated sinclair C5 lanes to replace bus lanes
    5. pneumatic pogosticks
    6. crosstown zeppelin services
    7. tuk-tuks
    8. coal-carries by hoochie mammas
    9. complementary BJs if your train is delayed by more than 15mins
    10. network of zipwires across the Thames
    11. Star Trek style energizers to replace underground stations
    12. genetically modified kangaroos
     
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  8. VenomPD

    VenomPD Merrick jr

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    The easiest way to ease congestion and make the average journey more bearable would be to mercilessly execute about half the population of London.

    Problem solved in one fell swoop.
     
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  9. Toby

    Toby GC's Life Coach

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    Everyone south of the river can go, and most of the west/south west of London too.
     
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  10. Otto Flayshow

    Otto Flayshow Well-Known Member

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    Hasn't worked out that south west of London is south of the river. <doh>
     
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  11. Deleted 1

    Deleted 1 Well-Known Member
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    Intersting solution and not one whcih i'm entirely against especially if i could have a say in who gets executed. An alternative, of course, is for all those who moan about it all the time, to appreciate that they live in one of the most reknowned cities in the world and accept that this has its price to pay - and shut the **** up about it <ok>.
     
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  12. VenomPD

    VenomPD Merrick jr

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    I think it's a solution that would work quite well in overly populated urban areas.

    I had the idea when I was stuck in traffic for 45 minutes at 2pm on a Wednesday this week in Aberdeen. It struck me that if we casually slaughtered every person who was needlessly on the road then the problem would entirely disappear.
     
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  13. The Raging Oxter

    The Raging Oxter Well-Known Member

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    If more people got off their fat arses and walked or cycled (where possible) it would ease congestion and make a serious dent in the obesity problem.
     
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  14. RAVENBLACK

    RAVENBLACK Well-Known Member

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    I wholeheartedly agree.

    The main reason I am so slim and always will be.

    Well that and worms.
     
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  15. Toby

    Toby GC's Life Coach

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    Not all of south west London is south of the river <doh>

    I said most <doh>
     
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  16. Deleted 1

    Deleted 1 Well-Known Member
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    <laugh> People should walk. Too many cyclists in london don't think the rules of the road, such as stopping at pedestrian crossings, apply to them. As for the ones who think it's perfectly acceptable to ride on the pavement at roughly the same speed as Mark Cavendish <steam>
     
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  17. VenomPD

    VenomPD Merrick jr

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    Everyone I know who cycles in London has had their bike nicked at least once as well.
     
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  18. RAVENBLACK

    RAVENBLACK Well-Known Member

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    Cyclists on pavement really **** me off. I'd have the ****s shot.

    Also pedestrian ****ers staring at their mobile phones and not looking where they are going. I've taken to just walking right into the ****ers. The bruising is dying down.
     
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  19. Toby

    Toby GC's Life Coach

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    Stolen bike sales account for 4.5% of London's GDP <ok>
     
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  20. gas

    gas ACCOUNT DELETED
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    I get pissed off with old ****s complaining when I'm walking along the pavement looking at my phone and accidently bump into them cos I'm not looking where I'm going. ****ing old bastards should have more respect for us modern folk. If they don't like it stay off the path.
     
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