came out of a pub in grangemouth after apparently insulting the local hardman, all i said was nah never heard of you when he did the do you know who i am pish. Called 8 of his pals to come and jump me my 2 of my pals and my pals pregnant burd. first pal ran away as soon as the shouting started, he re appeared once the police arrived in tears about how scary it was. <hero> my other pal got a real doing by adopting the classic fighting tactic of play dead, i managed to break one of their noses after he bottled me, i turned round said what the **** are you doing and punched him in the face, he ran away after that. the pregnant burd was running around smacking ****s on the head with the heel of her stilettos and i ruined my trainers kicking one of them in the face. after being knocked to the ground, he tried to kneel over me to punch my face so i stamped up at his face as he was on his way down. blood everywhere they all left after that and i called an ambulance for my pal who was lying in some ****s garden after getting his ass kicked through the garden wall. it went to court but the wee knob must have been a mason, he was on probation at the time of the attack but he got away with only a caution because he pleaded guilty at the last minute and had been behaving himself recently.
Me & Hash fought our way out of Cork prison, with Waddos on the roof of the prison ripping up slate and launching them at Police and Prison officers. We made our escape under the prison fence, fled to Portugal only to find the Prison governors son and a bunch of Russian mafia waiting for us. We ran into our appartment, got together all our weapons (Few 9MM Pistols, Mac 10, MP5 and a Machete). Met up with Loiner (As he was called back then) on the Beach. All of a sudden, Three Russians appear from nowhere and take a few pot shots at us. I return fire, miss them and they leg it. So we went over to a bunch of dodgy Romanian geezers who run Half the town. They'd been conflicting with the Russians and tipped us off as to where the Russians would be spending there night drinking. They offered us €40,000 to take out a hit on the Russians. We made our way over to the French run bar, walked in weapons in hand. ****. It was a set up. Romanians and Russians were taking shots, I turn to my left, sprayed a few up with my MP5 before taking a hit. I woke up to find myself on a helicopter flying over Columbia. Hash had saved us all that night. Hero. We was now repaying the favour after he was kidnapped by a Columbian drug cartel after a brave attempt at stealing 500 Ibs of Skunk and 350 Ibs of Cocaine.
nah, she had the kid 2 years ago with out even getting a bump. my mate also claims not to have tasted the milk.
Had a fight with 4 english lads down here about 6 weeks ago. Lad bumped into me in a pub, and I just said out of politeness "Sorry mate..." He replied "You will be sorry you Irish prick!"... which was particularly confusing seeing as I'm from Glasgow. Told him to **** off, he tried to stick the nut on me and missed (A fair achievement in itself, considering the size of my foredome!) so I started hitting him till he fell on his arse. His mate started swinging at me, so started fighting with him, while his other mate was hitting me from behind. We all fell onto some poor bird sitting behind us, before the bouncers came over to split up what was probably looking like a semi-gay orgy by then. Was all over pretty quickly, and we all only got a few punches in each. Left me with a lovely black eye, and big scratch down my cheek (think that's where he hit me with his handbag), while the 1st lad's nose was busted and the 2nd lad had a black eye. Felt bad for their mate who just stood at the back and minded their drinks the whole time, as he got lobbed out by the bouncers with the rest of them, when he didn't do feck all. Meant I looked gorgeous as ever for the Monday when I started my new job...
I took an elbow to the face from my own goalie in a football match once, about 2 days before the end of my exams one year. Turns out most classy night spots are fairly reluctant to let in someone with two black eyes, and a cut on the bridge of their nose!
i got a totaly shoeing 18 hours after coming home from iraq it wasnt all bad, at least when it happened i was so pissed i couldnt feel pain.
Anyone ever had a fight with one of those short mentalists that keep getting up and walking at you no matter what you do?
when i was about 17 i was in a pub in inverness and some old bloke (about 50) took exception to us and was gobbing off etc etc. when i went for a piss he was already there and started to kick of. i kinda grabbed him, he slipped in the piss on the floor (actually got airborne), and this kinda caused me to smash his head down hard into the porcelin urinal. i thought i'd killed him, his face was split open and his ear was bleeding but he just got up on to all fours and calmly said "i'm going to ****ing kill you". he didnt even sound angry. i didnt bother kicking him, i just ran like the wind.
