Slapper

He should have taken a hammer (to her) head.

Dammit. That was worse than your pun. Lower than a dover sole's baws. But, let's skate around that.

 

Well you know what they say about giving a person a fish and they'll eat for a day? - well, idrop a large slab of concrete on his head and the pikey **** won't be pestering you for fish ever again

 

So the Scales of Justice tipped in the victim's favour?

 

Give a man fire and he'll be warm until the fire burns out, set a man on fire and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.

 

Walk a mile in another man's shoes and he has little chance of catching you.

 

But I have more than one pair of shoes.

 

Do you always carry a spare pair smartarse?

 

Unless he has blades of thunder.

 

Yes. In a Nike brand shoe bag.

 

...and spare socks.

 

Or he's Mr Tumnas that goat legged **** from Narnia

 

****ting all over the carpet too the dirty swine.

 

When did ye get back? How is Aslan these days?

 

Is that Jesus the Lion?

 

I had a smoke and listened to Aslan, but when I told them I preferred Peter Tosh they flung me right back through the wardrobe.

 

Are you married to Edge?

 

Imelda Gambol

 

Newgod? Is he still no house trained Dev?

 

He's the king of trolls as well as being a good argument for Youth In Asia.

 

.