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I need a **** but................................

Discussion in 'Sunderland' started by Billy Death, Feb 13, 2014.

  1. Billy Death

    Billy Death Well-Known Member

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    .......................................I have piles, any suggestions?
     
    #1
  2. Brian Storm

    Brian Storm Well-Known Member

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    please log in to view this image


    <laugh>
     
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  3. Billy Death

    Billy Death Well-Known Member

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    I got that marra,although it's those bits of soap you shove up your arsehole. <ok>.
     
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  4. Brian Storm

    Brian Storm Well-Known Member

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    Nice. <laugh> Good luck with err that problem fella. <ok>;)
     
    #4
  5. Commachio

    Commachio Rambo 2021

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    please log in to view this image
     
    #5
  6. Blind Corner

    Blind Corner Active Member

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    Not much you can do with the auld Jeremy Kyles, or was it the farmer Giles, or even the Nobby Stiles, or the Ceramics, or the Plymouths, any more for the collection ?
    Whatever you do, don't have the operation, it's THE most painfull thing ever, better off living with them and thinking of other names for them.
     
    #6

  7. flandersmackem

    flandersmackem Well-Known Member

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    Take laxatives Billy...so much easier crapping through an eye of needle when you have Royds. I am a fellow sufferer. Also bang in a few suppositorys..works a treat.
     
    #7
  8. Vincemac

    Vincemac Well-Known Member

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    Wow
     
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  9. password invalid

    password invalid Well-Known Member

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    squat over a vice tighten it and stand up quickly, then soak in napalm and tcp.............it stings a bit
     
    #9
  10. Sidthemackem

    Sidthemackem Newcastle United 0-1 Cambridge United Staff Member

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    Chicken vindaloo. That Tom Tit's coming out regardless. Piles or no piles....

    That'll be twenty quid, please.

    Dr Sid
     
    #10
  11. Billy Death

    Billy Death Well-Known Member

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    Had the op years ago mate but they've come back. You're right like, it was like ****ting broken glass afterwards.
    Aye, got some arse bullets marra but staying at my mates helping her decorate & forgot to bring em with me.
     
    #11
  12. Blind Corner

    Blind Corner Active Member

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    When I had my op even the quack said " your first ***t will be like a red hot cannon ball wrapped up in a hedgehog" and he was right as we'll.
     
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  13. Billy Death

    Billy Death Well-Known Member

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    Oh dear, I see the coward Sammy's ****ty skils has been on again, the queer.
     
    #13
  14. marcusblackcat

    marcusblackcat SAFC Sheriff Forum Moderator

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    This actually made me wince!!
     
    #14
  15. Deletion Requested1

    Deletion Requested1 Well-Known Member

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    One for the older generation Rockford's - as in The Rockford Files starring James Garner in the seventies
     
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  16. Disco down under

    Disco down under Well-Known Member

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    Don't know whether to laugh, cry or throw up at this conversation.
     
    #16
  17. Deletion Requested1

    Deletion Requested1 Well-Known Member

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    or you could always have a tom
     
    #17
  18. Blunham Mackem

    Blunham Mackem Well-Known Member Forum Moderator

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    And so the saga continues.

    No word is heard from Billy for hours on end

    Has he, hasn't he!

    Jeez the tension!

    Haway Billy gives us an update! Are you a few pounds lighter yet?

    Seriously though Billy, drink as much water as you can mate. You're very probably a little dehydrated which is often the main cause of this problem. You'll pee most of it away but some of it will get through and "soften up your load"
     
    #18
  19. Rick O'Shea

    Rick O'Shea Well-Known Member

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    Is that like Schrodingers cat? Has he, hasn't he?

    Finally someone has explained it terms I can relate to.
     
    #19
  20. Tel (they/them)

    Tel (they/them) Sucky’s Bailiff

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    Or your Rogers - as in Roger Bannister four minute miles.
     
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