Subject: GHOST SEX... A professor at Auburn University was giving a lecture on Paranormal Studies. To get a feel for his audience, he asks, 'How many people here believe in ghosts?' About 90 students raise their hands. Well, that's a good start. Out of those who believe in ghosts, do any of you think you have seen a ghost?' About 40 students raise their hands. That's really good. I'm really glad you take this seriously. Has anyone here ever talked to a ghost?' About 15 students raise their hand. Has anyone here ever touched a ghost?' Three students raise their hands. That's fantastic. Now let me ask you one question further...Have any of you ever made love to a ghost?' Way in the back, Ahmed raises his hand. The professor takes off his glasses and says 'Son, all the years I've been giving this lecture, no one has ever claimed to have made love to a ghost. You've got to come up here and tell us about your experience.' The Middle Eastern student replied with a nod and a grin, and began to make his way up to the podium. When he reached the front of the room, the professor asks, 'So, Ahmed, tell us what it's like to have sex with a ghost.' Ahmed replied, "Aw ****, from back there I thought you said "Goats."
Kinnear unable to get any signatures on leaving card 05-02-14 JOE Kinnear has left St Jamesâ Park for the last time with a blank farewell card. Newcastle Unitedâs departing director of football reported solid interest in the glossy A6-sized rectangle but it remained un-inked. He said: âTo you this might look like a blank card with a picture of a downcast owl on it, but what you canât see is how close I was to getting Shola thingy to sign it or that other one, the French or Mexican lad?â Kinnear was an unexpected choice when he was appointed director of football last June, having previously been the least popular manager in the clubâs history. The ex-Wimbledon manâs popularity if anything decreased when he mispronounced the names of several players and indeed the city of Newcastle, but he insisted he should be judged on his signings. A bullish Kinnear subsequently inundated Lionel Messiâs general mailing address with letters, chasing Cristiano Ronaldo with a ballpoint pen and even insisting a deal for Ferenc Puskas was âall but doneâ. However Messi never replied, Ronaldo was too fast and Puskas had passed away in 2006. Many fans felt Kinnearâs subsequent attempt to exhume the Hungarian legend was distasteful. The low point for Kinnear came in the January transfer window when he unveiled himself as Brazilian winger âKinnearinhoâ at a press conference sporting an unconvincing wig. Few Newcastle United fans fell for the trick, knowing full well that Kinnearinho had just signed for Sporting Lisbon
David Moyes has promised fans of Manchester United that they will be in a major European competition next year... even if he has to write the song himself.
Very good...On a serious note, I believe that Man U fans will stay behind him on the whole this season, but if he has a bad start to next season they will turn on him..
