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Your Mum jokes

Discussion in 'General Chat' started by TC (Lovely Geezer), Jun 13, 2011.

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  1. TC (Lovely Geezer)

    TC (Lovely Geezer) Well-Known Member

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    Your Mums so fat that the other day she ran into the road so I had to swerve to miss her and ran out of petrol!!
     
    #1
    TC (Lovely Geezer), Jun 13, 2011
  2. Mick

    Mick Probably won't answer PMs Staff Member

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    Your ma is so fat she got hit by a parked car.

    Your ma is so fat the last time she went for a swim at the beach she got colonized by the Spanish.
     
    #2
    Mick, Jun 13, 2011
  3. MUFCOK

    MUFCOK Active Member

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    Your mam's so stupid, she spent twenty minutes lookin' at an orange juice box because it said "concentrate".
     
    #3
    MUFCOK, Jun 13, 2011
  4. Welcome to the North

    Welcome to the North Active Member

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    Yer Mam is a rather disreputable character <ok>
     
    #4
    Welcome to the North, Jun 13, 2011
  5. MUFCOK

    MUFCOK Active Member

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    Most mam's gobble up cock like its going out of fashion. It's nature.
     
    #5
    MUFCOK, Jun 13, 2011
  6. Jerel Ifil

    Jerel Ifil Well-Known Member

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    I've got your mum tied up in my cellar and she's grovelling for her slowly-fading life.
     
    #6
    Jerel Ifil, Jun 13, 2011

  7. MUFCOK

    MUFCOK Active Member

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    Your mam choked on my dick and is rotting away in my dogs kennel.
     
    #7
    MUFCOK, Jun 13, 2011
  8. Jerel Ifil

    Jerel Ifil Well-Known Member

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    Your mum's a Liverpool fan with a stinking scouser-minge which oozes the scouser-puss which covered you when you were secreted at birth and which still covers your spirit to this day.
     
    #8
    Jerel Ifil, Jun 13, 2011
  9. Waddos_legends

    Waddos_legends Active Member

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    Your mum's so fat, when she went out in a malcolm X t-shirt a helicopter landed on her!
     
    #9
    Waddos_legends, Jun 13, 2011
  10. tourettesaint

    tourettesaint New Member

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    yer mam is so fat she needs planning permission to sit down.
     
    #10
    tourettesaint, Jun 13, 2011
  11. TC (Lovely Geezer)

    TC (Lovely Geezer) Well-Known Member

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    Your Mum is so fat that when I shot the bitch lard came out.
     
    #11
    TC (Lovely Geezer), Jun 13, 2011
  12. Hugh Briss

    Hugh Briss Well-Known Member

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    Your Mama is SO fat that she has to wear a watch on each wrist - one for each time zone.

    Your Mama is SO fat that when she went to Texas, she got arrested for illegal oil drilling because she was wearing high heels.

    Your Mama is SO fat that she got arrested in airport customs for having 200lbs of 'crack' in her knickers.
     
    #12
    Hugh Briss, Jun 13, 2011
  13. Whole-lot-of-Holt_HtH

    Whole-lot-of-Holt_HtH New Member

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    #13
    Whole-lot-of-Holt_HtH, Jun 13, 2011
  14. Jerel Ifil

    Jerel Ifil Well-Known Member

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    #14
    Jerel Ifil, Jun 13, 2011
  15. Whole-lot-of-Holt_HtH

    Whole-lot-of-Holt_HtH New Member

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    Aye its a lot more interesting than this ****ing **** mum joke bullshit, loiner.
     
    #15
    Whole-lot-of-Holt_HtH, Jun 14, 2011
  16. Shameless

    Shameless Well hung member

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    Your mum came round the other today, that's the last time I'm buying chloroform from Lidl.
     
    #16
    Shameless, Jun 14, 2011
  17. Whole-lot-of-Holt_HtH

    Whole-lot-of-Holt_HtH New Member

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    shut up shameless, disgraceful post
     
    #17
    Whole-lot-of-Holt_HtH, Jun 14, 2011
  18. MUFCOK

    MUFCOK Active Member

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    Your mam regularly goes to Bradford to get porked by the 'locals' The bitch invented bukkake. Proper spunk bucket your slut of a mother/sister.
     
    #18
    MUFCOK, Jun 14, 2011
  19. Null

    Null Well-Known Member Forum Moderator

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    Your maw's so fat her belt size is equator!

    Your maw's so fat that when she falls down and cuts herself, she bleeds gravy!

    Your maw's so fat that when I shagged her I burnt my arse on the lightbulb!

    Your maw's so fat as everytime I **** her I gie her a mars bar!
     
    #19
    Null, Jun 14, 2011
  20. Null

    Null Well-Known Member Forum Moderator

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    <laugh>
     
    #20
    Null, Jun 14, 2011
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