Turkeys

And if you can't get Mohammed to come to you ..............

 

I've invited Nigella Lawson over Smug, to make the cake.
Of course I shall have to sniff the flour off her hands.

 

That surprises me mate..They look pretty big and meaty when they charge towards you..

 

Telling porkies again I see!!!

 

I'm having pork too. Had Wood pigeon last year but my lady wanted white meat this christmas and she won't have turkey covered in pork crackling (which is the best way to keep the dry turkey basted and as moist as chicken).

 

Don't forget to politely ask if she'd like to sniff your cock

 

Do you know what Reg? Geese are more aggressive than bull terriers.
Best watch dogs ever man.

 

Yes, that's a very good idea Brian. Or you could simply drape it in streaky bacon, would do the same job.

 

Well Nigella's Jewish isn't she?
She'd have to get past my 11" foreskin first.

 

I take the crackling off and put the streaky bacon for the last half hour. more fat on the belly of pork, you don't need to baste once as it releases moisture for the entire roast, plus I don't like my bacon exposed to the oven heat for too long. Horses for courses (if you buy a cheap turkey from Tesco like but it's the most succulent juicy turkey I've ever eaten. Was a Tip from a very good Chef.

 

like taking the plastic wrap of a roll of wrapping paper

 

They might be tough Billy but they can't take a golf ball in the face!

 

I could almost have a **** ower that marra.

 

Shame, I was just about to invite you round for a meal before the match

 

Billy

That would ruin the cracklin

x

 

Always available Smug.

 

It would make a canny cabaret, mind

x

 

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