Doctor, Doctor, I keep seeing an insect spinning around Don't worry, it's just a bug that's going around
Well, if we're going for the oldies: Doctor, doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains. Pull yourself together!
Feller goes to the quack. The quack says " So Sir, what seems to be the trouble?". Feller says "I can't pronounce my Ts or my Fs". Quack says "Well you can't say fairer than that, then".
Patient: Dr Dr, I see snails slithering around on the ceiling. Dr: No you don't, you're just a crazy wooly batard.
A Smart Revenge between a Chinese and a American . After a round of beer the Chinese sensed that the famous producer was glaring at him. Suddenly, in a flash, the Chinese crashed down from his stool, felled by a vicious hook from the producer. Picking himself up, he yelled, "What the hell was that for?" The producer ranted: "That's for the bombing of Pearl Harbor, you #$@#$@!!#! My dad perished in that bombing!". "I am not Japanese, you stupid Nincompoop! I am a Chinese !". "Yeah yeah yeah ...Japanese, Burmese, Chinese, Vietnamese...you are all the same!" Regaining his composure, the Chinese took his seat and ordered a double from the bartender. A few seconds later, the Chinese turned around and delivered a deadly snake fist to the producer, sending him flat to the floor. "What was that for?!!" exclaimed the producer. "That's for the sinking of the TITANIC! I had ancestors on that ship!" the Chinese replied. "You ignorant chink! The TITANIC was sunk by an iceberg!" shouted the producer. "Yeah yeah yeah...Iceberg, Spielberg, Carlsberg...you are all the same!"