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Urgent. Help me!

Discussion in 'Newcastle United' started by Speedo, Mar 12, 2011.

?

What do I do?

  1. Maul the shagger

  2. Maul the ****er

  3. Maul my owner so no-one can enjoy her

  4. Hump the bed post

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  1. Speedo

    Speedo Active Member

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    I have a secret. I am a dog. Anyway, my problem:

    There's this bloke shagging my owner, and I'm trying to scare him off with my scary eyes. There's also a guy at the window ****ing on a ladder. What should I do?!
     
    #1
    Speedo, Mar 12, 2011
  2. Speedo

    Speedo Active Member

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    Oh ****, now he's doing that dirty **** to me (or at least about 61% of him is at the time of writing). Help!
     
    #2
    Speedo, Mar 12, 2011
  3. AsprillasFurCoat

    AsprillasFurCoat Member

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    Start humping the shagger while he's boning your owner. The bloke on the ladder will **** himself into a frenzy, losing his balence and plumetting to his death. Keep humping the shagger til he's got an arsehole like a welly top.
     
    #3
    AsprillasFurCoat, Mar 12, 2011
  4. u408379965

    u408379965 Well-Known Member

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    Hump the bed post. It seems like such an obvious thing to do in a crisis. <ok>
     
    #4
    u408379965, Mar 12, 2011
  5. Hatem Is A Geordie

    Hatem Is A Geordie Active Member

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    <laugh>
     
    #5
    Hatem Is A Geordie, Mar 12, 2011
  6. Leon Bessi

    Leon Bessi Active Member

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    what the hell am i reading?
    what is this about?
     
    #6
    Leon Bessi, Jun 9, 2011
  7. AH

    AH Active Member

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    <laugh>
    There were quite a few of these Urgent threads at one point, all the same story from different perspectives... it started out as actually a serious thread needing help

    The rest of them are in the Thread Directory, if you wanna take a peak.
     
    #7
    AH, Jun 9, 2011
  8. TheLittleGeordie

    TheLittleGeordie Active Member

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    <laugh> I read through all of these the other week, another great thing that happened on this forum
    started off as someone asking for help about seeing people cheating and the rest of us just took it from there
     
    #8
    TheLittleGeordie, Jun 9, 2011
  9. The Situation

    The Situation Active Member

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    Haha, now this is a thread I can get passionate about!!
     
    #9
    The Situation, Jun 9, 2011
  10. Agent Bruce

    Agent Bruce Well-Known Member

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    You mean you like humping bed posts?
     
    #10
    Agent Bruce, Jun 9, 2011

  11. Finnbad The Sailor

    Finnbad The Sailor Member

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    Are you one of Roy Keanes dogs?
     
    #11
    Finnbad The Sailor, Jun 9, 2011
  12. AH

    AH Active Member

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    Nice avatar AB <ok> How much did that cost ya to get printed?
     
    #12
    AH, Jun 9, 2011
  13. The Situation

    The Situation Active Member

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    hhmm .......Maybe :bandit:

    please log in to view this image
     
    #13
    The Situation, Jun 9, 2011
  14. u408379965

    u408379965 Well-Known Member

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    I'm more the "****ing on ladders" type. <whistle>
     
    #14
    u408379965, Jun 9, 2011
  15. Agent Bruce

    Agent Bruce Well-Known Member

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    £32 for the printing. £4 a number and £2 a letter.
     
    #15
    Agent Bruce, Jun 9, 2011
  16. Magpie Fozz

    Magpie Fozz Well-Known Member

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    Deffo the bed post <laugh>
     
    #16
    Magpie Fozz, Jun 9, 2011
  17. in carr we trust

    in carr we trust Member

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    no wonder we haven't heard from shameless today....
     
    #17
    in carr we trust, Jun 9, 2011
  18. Heavy Metal Toon

    Heavy Metal Toon Guest

    I'm sorry i had to bump this <laugh>
     
    #18
    Heavy Metal Toon, Jun 21, 2011
  19. Genghis Badger

    Genghis Badger Active Member

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    Tell your paw.
    Paw him back.
    Stick a tail on the shagger.
    ****e on his back.
     
    #19
    Genghis Badger, Jun 21, 2011
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