If you could be any footballer, who would you be and why?

Alright peeps, I'm bored at work and thought I'd start a pointless silly little thread for us all to join in with, you can thank me later.

If you could be any footballer past or present, who would you be and why?

Think I'd be Zlatan.

Reasons:

He's the national icon of Sweden (and Swedish girls are lovely ).

He's one of the best strikers in the world.

Is minted.

Seems to score some absolute worldies, including his 5 or 6 man dribble vs NAC Breda, the outrageous over head kick vs England and the recent weekend one of his high foot back heel vs Bastia.

Had the luxury of playing and living in Amsterdam (mmmm Amsterdam ), Turin, Milan, Barcelona and Paris.

Has won countless trophies.

Comes out with brilliant quotes to the press.

The dude is just a legend.

 

I'll be peter crouch as because I'm such a naturally good looking chap D) I would love to know how it feels to be a lanky goofy giant that has one of the most beautiful women in the world in his bed every night!....

Always thought it would be pretty cool to have the respect of someone like Paul Scholes, a quiet guy who was Zidane's favourite footballer, can't get a bigger comment then that!

 

!!!

 

Teddy

 

Bale. I'd go on strike at Real Madrid, until they release me or my contract runs down and then join Spurs again. I'd come up with a better celebration too, maybe bring back the one Lee Sharpe used to do.

 

Pele.
Changed the international game forever, from first appearing as a kid right up to 1970.
Tried to play the beautiful game even when the opposition were trying to put him in hospital.

 

http://www.caughtoffside.com/2012/03/23/top-10-sexiest-wags-in-the-world-hot-image-gallery/

I am not fussy, either footballer who owns one of these.

 

Rooney.... I have a thing for shagging oaps

 

Hope you don't enjoy sex then.

 

I'd never get out of bed in the morning!

 

"Hope you don't enjoy sex then."

I'm not in my 50s/60s yet for that comment to be relevant.
Or perhaps you know more about the "when" first occurred for Pele than we do ...

 

.

 

Of course the PR tragedy is that the money akin to now was not remotely available then.
Which would mean the great Pele would never have had to do those ads.

 

Plus he only ever played in South and North America. Had he have come to Europe, I'm sure he would have earned more, even in those days.

 

If you need to be a millionaire footballer to attract old women then you must be one ugly bastard

 

Gareth Barry, because I'd get £100k per week for being pretty bog standard.

Failing that, Gareth Bale, as my mere existence seems to irritate Showpony greatly.

 

You can attract OAPs any time you like then? We won't ask how you know.

 

With my massive...... pack of Werthers

 

Each to their own I suppose mate.

 

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