I found this on the charlton board, if you've got a few minutes, it's a canny read. Moments before Swansea City's Scott Sinclair slotted the penalty that finally put Monday's Championship play-off final beyond a Reading side who had mounted a stirring second-half comeback, the former England full-back turned Radio 5 Live analyst Michael Gray sent a brief dispatch into cyberspace. "There are play-offs and there is the one and only play-off," he tweeted. "Good game this, but no comparison to our game." The encounter to which Gray was alluding was arguably the most thrilling football match ever played at Wembley: a sensational Championship play-off final played between Charlton Athletic and Sunderland in 1998, from which the Addicks emerged triumphant 7-6 on penalties after the sides had played out a gripping 4-4 draw. Gray could be forgiven for wanting to erase all memories of the epic contest from his personal data bank â after 13 successive players had scored their penalties in the shoot-out, it was he who emerged the inconsolable villain of the piece courtesy of a spot-kick so feeble the ball might not have crossed the line even if the Charlton goalkeeper, Sasa Ilic, had not dived low to his left and waited patiently for it to roll into his arms. "I really didn't want to take one, it was something I just didn't want to do," says Gray about his darkest hour as a professional footballer. "I was a Sunderland boy, living the dream playing for my local team, and I just didn't want to be the person responsible for us losing such an important match." It could be argued there were others who were just as culpable. Gray's absence from his side's five nominated penalty-takers confirmed his reluctance to step up and he could reasonably have expected the outcome of the game to have been settled before fate's fickle finger eeny-meeneyed over the Wembley centre-circle and pointed his way. Strangely, neither Niall Quinn nor Danny Dichio, Sunderland's strikers on the field at the end, were among the chosen few, possibly because it is notoriously difficult to score penalties with your head. But while Gray ended up as the disconsolate public face of his side's defeat it was the Sunderland goalkeeper, Lionel Perez, who almost certainly cost them the game. For reasons best known to himself, with his side leading 3-2 near the end of normal time, the Frenchman dashed to the edge of his area to collect a cross he had no business attempting to pluck from the air, only to flap haplessly and allow Richard Rufus to head the most unlikely of equalisers. "We're talking 13 years ago now, so it's probably safe to say that while we didn't say anything at the time, we were absolutely fuming inside at Lionel," Gray recalls. "He was a very flamboyant goalkeeper and when he came for this cross, whatever way he tried to catch the ball, his feet ended up higher than his arms and he got nowhere near it. And I mean, for Richard Rufus to score the equaliser to take it into extra time â he'd never, ever scored for Charlton before. Our hearts just dropped because we'd been so close to the finish line and now we were facing extra time." In the ensuing half-hour, the sides traded goals again, with Nicky Summerbee putting Sunderland back in front, only for Clive Mendonca to restore parity with his third. Their nerves already shredded from the drama that had unfolded over the previous two hours, 22 players and 77,739 fans anxiously prepared for a denouement that got the better of some. "It's just the occasion, it gets to people," explains Gray, upon being asked why neither of Sunderland's strikers were in their chosen five. "You just say to yourself: 'Do I want to take a penalty?' and obviously Niall and Danny didn't fancy it. Eventually Niall took the one before me and then ⦠" At this point, his voice trails off, to be replaced by what sounds suspiciously like a giggle. Composing himself, he continues: "After Niall scored, I was looking around to see who was left to take one because I didn't want to. I looked at Danny. He was sat in the centre-circle with his boots off by his side, so it obviously wasn't going to be him. I remember saying to him: 'Are you OK there, Danny?' and he just said: 'No, I'm not going to take one, Mick.' I think I was the oldest person left who hadn't stepped up yet, so I decided I'd better have a go." Had Gray ever taken a penalty before? "Yeah, I took one before and I missed that as well," he laughs. "We were playing Liverpool away and Sunderland were on a run where we'd missed seven penalties in a row, so it got to my turn and David James saved it with his feet." I ask Gray what he recalls about the long walk from the centre-circle to the penalty spot. From where I stood watching, on a television in Dublin's International Bar, he looked terrified. "Well, even walking up to the spot, you're thinking about where you're going to put the ball and you're feeling confident that you're going to score your goal and wondering about who's going to go next," he says. He did not look confident. On the contrary, placing the ball on the spot, he looked genuinely scared. "I probably was terrified inside," he admits. "I don't know ⦠it's really hard to explain. It's the longest walk in the world from the centre-circle to the penalty spot and that referee handing you the ball. You're thinking to yourself, is this walk ever going to end? But then, when you put the ball down on the spot, you can't hear a thing. It's really bizarre, you put the ball on the spot and the only thing you can hear is the grass moving as you place it. Then you step back, pick your spot and try to block everything out of your mind while you wait for the referee to blow his whistle." Would Gray be prepared to concede that the spot he picked isn't the one where the ball ended up? He laughs again. "I don't ever want to see that spot again," he declares. "I picked it, I knew where I was going to play the penalty, I saw Ilic diving the way I was going to kick the ball and I just thought: 'Oh God ⦠no, he's going to save it.'" Considering how feebly Gray put his foot through the ball, it didn't take much saving. "No, it didn't," he says. "I was hoping he'd dive the wrong way and I'd look like a superstar. As it happened, I ended up looking as far away from a superstar as any footballer can possibly be." So he's just missed and the walls are closing in. Then what? "I was devastated," Gray says. "All the emotion hit me and I was thinking, 'Oh God, please somebody just run over and give us a hug.' We were shooting towards the Sunderland fans and I just wanted somebody to come and tell me everything was going to be OK. To be fair to some of the lads, they came over and told me I'd been brilliant during the season and to make sure I came back a stronger person. Now I didn't hear them at the time, but I've heard since that all the Sunderland fans started singing my name and that was very nice of them, because they understood the kind of pressure I was under. But I just couldn't wait to get off that pitch, get into the dressing room and go home." And in the dressing room? "It was quiet for a while," he says. "We were just sitting there taking off our boots when the manager Peter Reid and his first-team coach, Bobby Saxton, came in. They told us how proud they were and said we had to come back next season and hit the ground running. Then Niall stood up and said that if we all stuck together nobody would touch us, and he was absolutely right. We played so well that next season we felt unbeatable. We went up as champions with 104 points." Finally, some house-keeping. Perhaps Gray would be good enough to confirm or deny a couple of stories that circulated at the time. Is it true the Sunderland team stopped on the way home and embarked on an epic booze-up? "Yeah, we did," he says. "We got on the bus and got a certain way down the M1, pulled in to a hotel where they had stuff lined up for us and we just had a big drink. There were fans in there, we all had family there, and we all drowned our sorrows." And is it true shame forced Gray to go "missing" for several days, only to eventually turn up in a state of drunken disrepair at some cricket match or other? "Yeah, that's true," he says with a laugh. "I didn't really want to talk to anyone and there were people knocking on the door, so Peter Reid invited me over to his place in Yarm for a few drinks. He told me I'd been brilliant for him and encouraged me to use the next season to put things right, which is great because I needed to hear that. "So I stayed with him for a couple of days and then myself and a few of the lads travelled to Yorkshire to watch a few friends of ours playing cricket for Durham. We had a few too many drinks and a bit of banter with Darren Gough on the sideline ⦠it was just one of those summers where I let myself go for the first couple of weeks and then knuckled down and got myself fit and raring to go for the next one." His demons purged, Gray wraps up proceedings with a subtle reminder that despite his moment of unwanted ignominy, things quickly picked up. "I do Q&As up around the north-east and obviously that penalty miss is the story they all want to hear," he sighs. "Nobody's interested in my England caps, in me finishing seventh in the Premier League with Sunderland or Blackburn ... none of the good stuff. All they want to hear about is that bloody penalty. I don't mind that now but at the start it was one of those stories I didn't want to talk about. But looking back, I think it marked a point where I became a stronger person and it helped get me to where I got in my career."
Had Gray ever taken a penalty before? "Yeah, I took one before and I missed that as well," he laughs. "We were playing Liverpool away and Sunderland were on a run where we'd missed seven penalties in a row, so it got to my turn and David James saved it with his feet." If i had known this i might not have gone to Wembley that day lol.
What, despite the final result, and have missed one of the most exciting and enthralling games it has ever been my privilege to be at. Even a mate of mine, who is a Mag, said although it was us it was a game that neither team deserved to lose.
Oh not for me. I was staying at my brother's in Windsor. No not the castle. So I had a few days to get over it before I came home.
This was the most miserable trip home from a match EVER. Not a word was spoken as we got on the bus and there was absolute silence until we approached the Trowell service station outside Nottingham and the driver asked if anyone wanted to use the toilets. Amazingly not a single person replied but he pulled in regardless and no-one got off! My only words for the entire trip were a very brief cheerio to my brother as we got off at Penshaw Club. What an awful day that was.
I remember being in Idols in Sunderland after we spanked the un-washed 2 - 1 at Sid James and all the Sunderland lads were getting hammered with the fans. I remember Mickey Gray behind the bar in Idols running up and down the bar spraying champagne everywhere. Proper Sunderland legend.
Yip, skim read, now deleted. A vivid memory for me was the bruises a had all over my legs when I got home caused by the fact when we scored we seemed to end up 3 rows infront and 6 seats along. Amazing day, was only 12/13 at the time so id see it through different eyes today. I just remember seeing school friends in floods of tears yet I was just in a state of stunned silence. U said for years after that losing that game was the best thing that could have happened to us as we came back much stronger and that extra year in the 2nd tier made us much stronger going into the prem
Always hated play offs, still do. Three up . Three down on merit, but because this match was a thriller, its the sole reason I am stuck with play offs, money for the FA, IS ALL.
Worst I have ever felt after a football match. I was 17 at the time, was also the first time a girl said "cheer up it's only a game". 3 year's we had been together, we didn't stay together long after that. Bitch.
I recall getting in a taxi with friends to head back to where we'd parked the cars - all 4 of us in total abject silence. Taxi driver says "If it is any consolation lads it was one hell of a game ! " ....it f*****g wasn't any consolation !! Got back to Nottinghamshire still wearing my home shirt with the number 3 on it - went for a pint and in walk a bunch of Sunderland lads on their way home - stopping at a convenient pub on the A1 before last orders. As we chatted one of them noticed the 3 on the back of my top - "It's all his fault!" Mickey Gray - a local lad and one of my favourites of that era. He achieved what we all wanted to do growing up - play for his home town team - Legend !
