Commemorative Hypothetical Nonsense Thread - The High Addition

I would pick the age I am now. Pretty much my physical zenith and no hair loss!!!

 

Would you rather play for Newcastle united once (in decent enough condition to not be a burden), or have copious "relations" with Cheryl Tweedy (pre-Rose tattoo)?

 

I can answer a few questions the necrophilia and beastial question , I was married to a mackem ,dead from the neck up and when angry a right beast, allso thats got to count as a crime, the war question I was in the navy ,was involved in the cod war hms Yarmouth and the falklands hms intrepid,i know which one I was changing my pants on an hourly rate ,back in time question, go back to the time (several times) when I was doing sooooo well on the chat up front and just had 1 more pint went over the edge from having an intelligent conversation to being a slavering slob,the age thing I met the mackem at 22 so lets say 21,super hero the brown bottle out of viz,play for Newcastle or a Cheryl after coles been thru it ,prob would put blyth town never mind Spartans before that
my question your best mates sorting some junk out you spot something that you know is worth £500 he selling the stuff so he can renew his season ticket,the item is on sale for £25 but if you buy it n sell it on you can afford to renew your season ticket the 1 you've had for years the one your wifes said 'we cant afford' what do you do,its all or nothing no spltting

 

He might know it's worth £500 but he's just testing your friendship.

 

don't cop out !

 

My natural reaction would be to hand him over to the authorities... My mate is a student, he can't own anything worth that much by legal means...

However, if it happened it was legally obtained, I would point it out to him.


If you could be best mates with any Newcastle United player past or present, who would it be?

 

Wor Jackie.

 

I'd say Tim Krul. Was nice when I met him, and he's reading the same sort of books as me. Plus he's tall, so I could sit on his shoulders and pretend to be a giant

 

Hmm, Raylor for me I think. He just seems so down to earth and cool, just like a normal human with a great job, not like a lot of footballers.

If you could go back in time and change the first record/album/single that you bought, what you change it from and to???

 

Vivaldi's four seasons was the first album I ever bought. Yes, I was that kid.

I would change it to Josh Groban's imaginatively titled album, "Josh Groban"... Such wonderful hair, and such a beautiful voice...

If you could kill one man alive today (who isn't Mike Ashley), and get away with it, who would it be?

 

My next door neighbour when I was a teenager


If you could go back in time & have a conversation with anyone ..... who would you pick & why?

 

Sulla. The only absolute dictator in history to have simply retired one day and resumed living amongst the dictated to populace, and without having made any great gain form himself.

If could pick any 3 people, living or dead, for a working lunch who would you pick ?

 

Alexander III of Russia - I have a bitch of an essay to write on him for tomorrow, so he could be helpful...

If there was a film made of your life, who would you want to play you and why?

 

Harrison Ford: the thinking man's tough guy.

Name the thing that you have owned or possessed at one point in your life and which you don't have any longer which you'd most like to have back

 

a bank balance that was in the black
a tramp in New York found $2000 and some travellers cheques he handed them in and has ended up with about 100 grand as a website has been set up to reward his honesty,
on the flip side have you ever regretted being honest and if so what was the situation

 

The Greek Persian war...The Battle of Thermopylae...for me.


If little curly Kev, hadn't went into meltdown...and fried his own brain sack.


Would we have won the title?