Off Topic Last Person To Post Wins...........

Don't you just hate it when you fart and you follow through??

And you have skid marks on your pants all day, with an itchy bum crack thinking where did I put my talcum power?

 

Yeah the ones that sort of go flufffffff

 

That's why I never wear white

 

Best kind of **** is when it comes out really fast and in one big chunk, none of that droplets **** and it comes out so dry and quick you don't even need to wipe and then you feel refreshed and relieved.

 

why do i always walk in when its weird

 

Awks

 

The ones that poke up out of the water really stink though don't they

 

I like the close the lid let the smell really gather up and then when some one goes to open it up WHAM!!! Right up the nose.


Tiger do you even feel **** come out anymore? Only asking because you've been smashed up the back door a few times.

 

Bet its like a penny down a well. Doesn't even touch the sides

 

, like when you slimy fart and put your finger in the crack then under your mates nose

 

there's a bloke at work who doesn't wash his hands after a poo and leaves **** splashed all over the bog, dirty ****

 

!

 

Anyone ever shat in their hands and clapped?

 

never fart in Brett's car! ****er acts like you just killed his mum.

 

Bollocks bet that's you.


Have you ever had a pooh in work and timed yourself just to work how much the company paid you for a pooh?

 

No but sometimes I piss into the wind.

 

Yeah it's a confined area!!!

 

When you have a **** in a public place do you try and time it as quickly as a piss so everyone thinks you've had a piss not a ****

 

**** off, I even wash my hands after a piss. years ago there was a bloke sniffing around my ex-wife so I curled down a big steaming pile of **** on his doorstep

 

Sorry!! Forgot your farts don't stink!!

A ****ing nose like a dog, I only got to let a little one out and your moaning.