Room 101

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The Chief said:
Some valid points Benson.

I've got three kids myself and I can't ****ing stand other people imposing their kids on me. I'm great only with certain kids, my own and my friends kids who I'm comfortable with. Otherwise, **** off.

Was down the beach with mine last weekend and there were these two women who just let their brats swarm all over my three year old and take his spade and dinosaurs off him. "Aww bless" (another thing anyone should be assassinated for even murmering) they say as they just ignore their children and leave me to deal with them.

I stopped short, just, of screaming 'fuuuuuuuuuuuuuck offfffffffffffffff' at the top of my voice to the little ****s.


I own two pairs of Uggs though so what do I know? (not the usual type mind, but I am still accused of gayness)




Stayed in a B&B last night and came down to breakfast to a thing I dread, some other twat at the breakfast table. They also broke every single rule in the book;


Firstly, do not, under any circumstances try to engage me in conversation. Not interested. Not interested in you or anything you have to say.
Secondly, I do not want to hear you eat. Not slurping you ****ing pond life.
Thirdly, when your colleagues come down to join you, please do not surround me while I am eating and stand literally two centimetres off my back, thanks.
Fourth, should your minging farmer type female fellow person start talking about her sickness and ****s when I have a mouthfull of mueslli, how about she shuts the **** right up.
I really, really, don't want the mental picture of this fat woman pissing **** out of her arse as my beans on toast arrives at the table.

****ers.
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I laughed at this, a lot. Well done
 
Forced joviality - people who seem to think that there's certain occasions that require every living soul, to turn into some grinning idiot who's prepared to laugh at even the most inane & unfunny quip e.g. Christmas. "get into the spirit". No, how about you get the **** out of my face, taking your feelings of obliged jollyness with you, you docile moron.

ear hair - seriously, what's the ****ing point? It's like natures way of telling a middle aged man, that he's over the hill.
 
My kids friends knocking on the door all holiday asking my kids if they can come in to play. He I ask why can't you all play in your house I get the response 'we're not allowed to play in our house' - Yeah but your ****ing parents are happy to send you round to our house ALL ****ING DAY.
 
KingEric07 said:
My kids friends knocking on the door all holiday asking my kids if they can come in to play. He I ask why can't you all play in your house I get the response 'we're not allowed to play in our house' - Yeah but your ****ing parents are happy to send you round to our house ALL ****ING DAY.
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Just start a rumour that you're on the register, that'll sort it <ok>
 
I've already added his address to the iPhone peado app.. By the time he gets home his house will have nonce spray painted across the front of it.. <ok>
 
School of Science said:
Forced joviality - people who seem to think that there's certain occasions that require every living soul, to turn into some grinning idiot who's prepared to laugh at even the most inane & unfunny quip e.g. Christmas. "get into the spirit". No, how about you get the **** out of my face, taking your feelings of obliged jollyness with you, you docile moron.

ear hair - seriously, what's the ****ing point? It's like natures way of telling a middle aged man, that he's over the hill.
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The amount multiplies the more kids you have.

Had non at all, first son comes along and my ears start sprouting hair. Kid two comes along, this doubles. Now have three and my ears are just off the scale mental and it grows really quickly and stealthily.

I'm just waiting for them to start coming out of my nose now, and I mean the nose not nostrils.
 
People who think it's all right to go up to complete strangers in pubs, impose themselves on them and try to shake their hands then get incredibly aggressive when said handshake is completely ignored.

People who say something once thinking it's funny when it's not and then spend the ne0xt 25 years making the exact same comment every time you meet them.
 
Has anyone put Libpewl Football Club & their badge wearing, big flag waving, pocket pissing, history dwelling, full kit wearing, ****er fans, in yet?
 
Drogs said:
don't the septics use 'sidewalk'?
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My point exactly.

English usage - you walk on the pavement and drive on the road
American usage - you walk on the sidewalk and driven on the pavement

http://www.macmillandictionary.com/dictionary/british/pavement

If civil engineers are referring to the surface of the road as the pavement, this is just another example of how the Americans **** up every, and I mean every, thing.

School of Science said:
Ok, then in that case, I nominate the not so mighty Redmen for Room 101 <ok>
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But then who would we laugh at most weekends? And most days for that matter...
 
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