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OT - any tips for naturally inducing labour?

Discussion in 'Newcastle United' started by whack&blite, Jan 15, 2013.

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  1. canary-dave

    canary-dave Well-Known Member

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    I found with mine that a motorbike ride over a frozen ploughed field at 80 mph did the trick!

    Very best of luck to the three of you and remember, the first twenty years are the worst!

    <bubbly>
     
    #21
    canary-dave, Jan 15, 2013
  2. Agent Bruce

    Agent Bruce Well-Known Member

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    Life's a bitch and then you die.
     
    #22
    Agent Bruce, Jan 15, 2013
  3. Katmandu

    Katmandu New Member

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    You missed out the supporting a team that never wins anything
     
    #23
    Katmandu, Jan 15, 2013
  4. LTF

    LTF Well-Known Member

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    Hmmm, Brutal.........!!!!!!
     
    #24
    LTF, Jan 15, 2013
  5. TheJudeanPeoplesFront

    TheJudeanPeoplesFront Well-Known Member

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    Glad we're providing a positive atmosphere and impression for this young family! <ok>

    Nobody mentioned the loneliness FYI... The loneliness, even when you're surrounded by people...
     
    #25
    TheJudeanPeoplesFront, Jan 15, 2013
  6. whack&blite

    whack&blite Active Member

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    Yes, the little guy doesn't have a clue that he has a lifetime of supporting a team that never wins anything ahead of him.

    And the cycle continues...
     
    #26
    whack&blite, Jan 15, 2013

  7. Katmandu

    Katmandu New Member

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    You never know but I'm fairly certain once I've passed we will win the treble so he might be ok mate.
     
    #27
    Katmandu, Jan 15, 2013
  8. whack&blite

    whack&blite Active Member

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    Planning on going any time soon?! ;)
     
    #28
    whack&blite, Jan 15, 2013
  9. Katmandu

    Katmandu New Member

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    No but you never know when that bastard up there will hold your name card up! no doubt with a grin on his face when it's mine, I'm not looking forward to what he has in store for the challenge in which I finally buckle but I'm braced for it I tell you.
     
    #29
    Katmandu, Jan 15, 2013
  10. whack&blite

    whack&blite Active Member

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    Very true, very true.
     
    #30
    whack&blite, Jan 15, 2013
  11. TheJudeanPeoplesFront

    TheJudeanPeoplesFront Well-Known Member

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    I predict 2037... Your newly built fence fails to keep out the revolting throngs, and the alarm system just alerts others to your potential demise...
     
    #31
    TheJudeanPeoplesFront, Jan 15, 2013
  12. Katmandu

    Katmandu New Member

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    I have a secret also but the person that comes through the door first may find the last moments of his existance someone unpleasant.
     
    #32
    Katmandu, Jan 15, 2013
  13. Albert's Chip Shop

    Albert's Chip Shop Top Grafter Forum Moderator

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    I see your rep is on the climb.
     
    #33
    Albert's Chip Shop, Jan 15, 2013
  14. No Kane No Gain

    No Kane No Gain Well-Known Member

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    Blowjobs and lots of 'em <ok>

    And if you don't think she'll buy that then hoovering and cooking is still worth a shout <whistle>
     
    #34
    No Kane No Gain, Jan 15, 2013
  15. Minxy

    Minxy Just Me

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    All the best for the little ones arrival

    Think the female having the orgasms is much more likely to make the uterus contact ... than the male having one

    Worked well for me .... twice

    & a lovely way to get things going ;)
     
    #35
    Minxy, Jan 15, 2013
  16. Katmandu

    Katmandu New Member

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    using the word uterus is far to scientific when suggesting a bonk will do the trick
     
    #36
    Katmandu, Jan 15, 2013
  17. Santiago Munez

    Santiago Munez Well-Known Member

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    Curry, scary films, make her jump, sex?
    Not in that order
     
    #37
    Santiago Munez, Jan 15, 2013
  18. Minxy

    Minxy Just Me

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    did I mention a bonk ?
     
    #38
    Minxy, Jan 15, 2013
  19. Katmandu

    Katmandu New Member

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    Not as such but I wasn't being narky about it mate.
     
    #39
    Katmandu, Jan 15, 2013
  20. 2010 tops dog

    2010 tops dog Well-Known Member

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    I am in the same position my little one is due tomorrow but I recon it will be late first one was ten days late, its the longest few weeks of the pregnancy but will be worth the wait,currys, long walks might help
    Good luck
     
    #40
    2010 tops dog, Jan 15, 2013
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