Awfy quiet on here this mornin...

...is it a bank holiday that I am unaware of?

Apropos of **** all, I went to bed early last night for the first time in ages, got up at my usual time feeling like ****. What's that all about?

 

Did you go to bed sober?

Your body's probably in shock

 

Means you're either a **** or a *****

 

The footie trivia question was too easy today,it did'nt even get me up to my 10 o'clock tea

 

or a lesbo or a spazzy, quite possibly all four in fact, he is from South Lanarkshire after all.

 

I had my usual bottle of vino

 

If you have time on your hands, you could try to find out who The Secret Footballer is. Report back with the results of your investigation this time next week.

 

pisshead!

 

But then he wouldn't be secret anymore.

 

I'll have you know I am a social drinker. Cos if I don't drink am not at all sociable in any way.

 

Well I'm not sociable with or without a drink, so beat that smelly.

 

Ahm busy

 

.

 

Apparently it's Margaret Thatcher Day in the Falkland Islands today, so all our regulars from there are probably out fighting miners or stealing people's milk.

 

I've just had a very busy morning - sold off 500 council houses and given the money to people earning more than £5 million so they donlt have to pay so much tax

 

Thank God (no offence Darwinists/Aetheists) someone is doing their bit.

 

Apologies Gambol, had to get in a bit of early mornin rioting before tonights big lockdown.

 

Fair enough Guvnor

 

I think this answer is lacking a little scientific rigour

 

Hullo, doll.