Military Advice Needed

Rogue, you there? Anyone else?

I have a new desk in work, it's right beside the entrance. That ****ing door slams about every 5 seconds. It's doing my nut in. Why the **** a floor of < 40 people has to go out and in the door every 5 seconds is beyond me.

So, I want set up a trip wire or similar booby trap. I just want to do enough damage to make everyone think about whether they "have" to go out the door i.e. create a bit of doubt.

Trip wire? Maybe if it could say "This door is armed, please try later" or something like that it would work. A very small explosion would be good too.

I dont' know how to do this. Any advice from our forum soldiers?

 

Your job is taking money from the public to use the public toilets. Of course the door's going to be going every five seconds.

 

My job takes money from the public? Please explain?

 

I think I just got your pathetic atempt at humour. I have a simple mind but it still took me ages to get that simple humour.

What the **** has happened to you in the last 6 months ST?

 

He's no been well.

 

He's always been "not well".

But since I managed to get back on this forum (due to you ****'s terrible language causing a firewall block) he's been so down.

Worried about the Saville investigation ST?

They're coming for you.....

 

Up your firewall!

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Seriously, I'm going to kill someone soon. I need your help. I dont want to be bum-raped for the next 14 years. Help me get the satisfaction of stopping the door ****ers before i do anything stupid.

Thanks

 

Wait until everyone's gone home, remove doors and replace with beads

I've got millions of brilliant ideas.

 

hahaha that sounds like a "top tip" out of Viz in the 90s!

 

Every door way in ST's house is a sex toy.

That should shock me but it doesn't.

 

I don't think I'd get away with beads but I could just really break the door. Then it'll take them 3 months to get it fixed then I'll break it again.

You're a genius ST

 

Ah wid

Back to the OP, you would be better asking one of the Oirish ****s, the way they go on it seems they are experts at explosives

 

Have you tried moving desks? Or sticking a bit of foam on the door, so it doesn't slam? Or fit those automatic doors in? Or a revolving door? They don't slam very often.

 

If you top yourself the doors wont bother you.

 

ER, get on the other thread about the netbook, Edge needs your help, I've been singing your praises on it all afternon about how good you are with modern technology!

 

More of Hash's geniune and honest wisdom .... Find a door with the ''this door is alarmed do not open'' sticker and take the sticker and put it on your offending door Dr.Pill in da mufukah house

 

Nobody likes you, everybody hates you, I think you should going eat worms.

 

Genius, then they'll get they're ass kicked in the H&S inspection.

Result. Nice one hash.